"it's hard to define, I could say I wish I never took the time to get accompanied with certain people. And feeling just momentarily, a feeling of betrayal.
But if I'm completely honest, I regret not letting them each see why it's beyond foolish to take that simple minded opportunity. I regret not planning ways to permanently make an environment worse than death for them each. Personalized to each of them, just to show how carefully and attentive I was to essentially learning everything about them. Particularly their weaknesses, or things I could use to steer them to their demise. I wouldn't be a good friend if I didn't know them my resolve . . . I regret not showing I was really listening.
Listening so much, that I've familiarized myself with the means to their ends.
You can say, I'm truly in love with the forbidden. Even the knowledge that brings them to the edge of no redemption of salvation.
I regret not showing my sick way of loving everything about them, and displaying that to them in clear concise ways.
I regret not having a stronger resolve to this.
But maybe this is a huge fib, for someone as callous as me.
Maybe they weren't really worth that resolve to begin with.
Perhaps this is a way of playing mind games, making them think I have a heavy hand in how things are turning out when in the end.
I've done nothing of particular value to change anything about the after to the friendships lost.
And it's all a ploy to invite paranoia by their own hands.
How interesting it would be to play no role at all to their logic failing and falling further into instability.
I suppose that's a regret one will have to find on their own."