The Weight Tied to My Waist

That ending sentiment is so heavy, and I don’t just mean in reference to weight. It really is a hefty chunk of emotion that almost gives this air of sadness in its wake.

So powerful. Gorgeously dark read.

-M

Thank you. I always appreciate your take on a piece, and when your comment lets me know I got where I was trying to go, it's particularly satisfying.

Awesome write.  

And I love that song by Mad Season.  
But, reading your poem actually reminds me of "Lydia" by Highly Suspect.   The video especially.  

Thank you so much. I wasn't familiar with "Lydia" so I wanted to wait until I had a chance to see the video. I hope she got herself untied quickly enough. Appreciate the read and comment, and pretty cool that it reminded you of something else. Thanks for sharing that. :-)

The young woman in that video is a Russian "mermaid".   They train to hold their breath for four minutes plus.  She was fine, and yes, she is actually under water the entire length of that song.  Incredible.
 

Oh wow, that is incredible! Interesting to know, thanks you. I figured the woman was fine, but hoping the character was too. :-)

Though, I enjoyed those bands when I heard them here and there in 1995, and I've found lately that I retained more of the songs of that genre than I'd have imagined, they weren't the albums I bought or the groups I followed with any focus. I'm not sure if I heard River of Deceit at the time, or not. A friend of mine recently started covering it at his gigs, and from the first several bars, then that opening line, I was hooked. With just his voice and an acoustic guitar, and the whole of my current life experience, it resonated in a way, I'm not sure it would have, for me, in my mid-twenties. Came home, listened to it from Mad Season. On repeat.

Somewhere along the line, I just knew I was going to poem this song eventually, and last Friday night, after one of above friend's gigs, I was driving home, and the words just started coming to me. And I actually remembered them when I got home, and was able to quickly scribble them down, then make something of it.

Fuck, I do go on.

There is resignation, for sure. I hadn't thought of it in terms of resentment, but I think some of the resignation is in letting go of resentment, and I'm digging that you picked up on something that wasn't intentional on my part.  Hadn't thought of the relief aspect, either, but I suppose there often is when you're in the hindsight part, understanding gained.

I've said it once. Still holds true. Your comments are gold. Thank you for taking some time with this piece.