Abstract

Whenever I ignore authority my behavior is not always deviant from the norm.

I am living on borrowed denial from the past.

I’m expecting it to redeem my future.

I’m dependent on it.

And I’m not lying.

Play me.

I keep expecting something bad to happen.

Waiting for the other proverbial shoe to drop.

That dreaded anxiety has been ingrained into my living essence since childhood.

Branded like an animal.

I recognize it now, if only for a moment.

It’s like I want something to happen and when nothing does I have to recognize that for what it is: quiet calm.

I would pronounce gratitude in abundance if I could feel it.

If it were confirmed into my bare being like shame was.

Imagine no one is ready to pounce. The reprieve of old punishment, old programming.

To dig deep into the wishing well of self-worth, self-confidence and self-esteem.

Affirmations of love and light will come to the surface to surround my wounded soul.

My heart thirsts for living affirmations to confront the rebellion rising up on the port side of my resistance.

Confessions of past transgressions are still in the waiting room.

The relationship with my reluctant inner child is in for proper prayers.

I will go in search of the cure while there is still favor.