Light in the darkness

"I am your friend
A soul for your soul.
A place for your life.
Home.  
Know this."
 
 
 
I wanted so badly to message her
but she deserves better  
than other peoples  
drunken  
insecurities
at 2am
 
I always felt  
like a woman of fire
and that made loving hard
to say the least
 
but this  
this is a poem  
and I am a writer  
and she makes me want  
to scream  
so profoundly  
and loudly  
that it doesn't just scar with emotion
but it lifts me off my feet
and slams me into a wall
until the room falls silent  
and the crack of skull against plaster
rattles the foundation  
and the windows splinter
and down goes the dome
I've built around myself  
that says I can't  
and that
I'm a shit writer anyway
 
so fucking what
 
I am the flame that devastates mountains  
and reshapes the very landscapes  
that cradle you safely  
tucked away into home  
at night  
I am the blaze battling the fragile wick
of your candles  
you pray to god under
when all hope is lost  
and there's nothing left  
but ashes in your dreams
I am the scourge of the earth  
scorching the forests  
fragmenting oceans into salt
and cumbusting in your lungs
as you gorge on your fluids  
and organs begin to shrink
never fully reaching  
total cremation
I am the pyre engulfing entire bodies
leaving nothing in its wake  
but fistuls of your love  
in decorated urns  
mounting the fireplace
of your living room
and the silver necklace  
tucked away into your dresser
 
I am the spark of a lighter  
hovering below pyrex glass
and I am the ignited difference  
between getting high  
and living
 
I am the blistering embers of a fag
I am the proud phenix in flight
and I am my own light in the darkness
 
except on the days where its raining surrender in my soul  
 
and I want so badly to message her
but she deserves so much better  
than other peoples  
drunken  
insecurities
at 2am