you're not "alone"

        
       
       
   " I don't belong here...." why do I feel this way?        
ok....        
       
       
     the way that I function; the way that I think; waking up in the morning like,"how the hell am I holding myself together at all? due to the way that I function; due to the way that I think....        
       
       
due to the fact that myself, and the environment around me are far from in sync(more or less).... a "creature of habit" alone to myself; alone with my self too much is equivalent to psychologically "cutting" myself-in other words unhealthy but....        
       
       
 the damage is done; my relationship with the world is like, I'm down to one lung (firguratively); and the rest of my organs soon won't have any fun....oh, and well my brain's almost always on the run....        
       
       
 without physicality, I'd be most definitely done; social isn't much my thing-convos- it takes effort to have one; you want to be mentally "stimulated"? well.... I'm just trying to survive....        
       
       
  and maintain a "balanced mind"; too honest? well "time" alone that goes by, further does things to ones' mind....        
       
       
 religion, politics/laws.... sure; I acknowledge, and respect them all.... but none of them will run one's experience we call life....though this experience called "my life"-most times I wish I could turn it off without thinking twice....        
       
       
but my mind....it won't allow me to; a constant tug of war with no edge on either side....        
so.... you're not "alone" if you feel this way at all; feeling as if life's one long walk in the fog....