Momster

 
One year on all Hallow’s eve the brothers Rob, Todd and Steve
Were at home bored when they decided to play with a Ouija board
But the dumbass semen summoned up a host of ghosts and demons
Opening a door to these haunting specters who arrived by the hordes

Rob, Todd and Steve couldn’t believe what they just had achieved
But they were more scared and concerned of what their mom woud say
It was just their luck when mom opened the door and said “what the fuck?
Which one of you little shits played the game and opened a gateway?”

The house rattled and jolted while demons knocked anything unbolted
When mom screamed “you pesky motherfuckers better settle your asses down”
The ghosts and ghouls were surprised that the woman wasn’t terrified
She was a ruthless mother like no other who wouldn’t take shit from these clowns

A demon tried throwing a knife at her but she caught it swiftly in mid air
Then turned and said “Who’s the pussy ass bitch that threw this fucking knife?”
That’s the moment the host of ghosts and demons knew they done fucked up
She had been a killer, a bitch, a witch, redeemed but still had not issue taking life

“We are a legion…” a demon started when she darted right over to him
“Motherfucker, I don’t give a fuck!” right to his ugly face with a shrill yell
“This is my house and you don’t come in here disrespecting me
So shut the fuck up before I stomp your ass and send you back to hell”

“But…” the demon tried to talk when she shushed him again with a finger up
“I swear, you’re going to piss me off” she said softly with a menacing look
All the while Rob, Todd and Steve stayed quiet in their brief reprieve
Their momma was pretty scary, she had the ghosts and demons all shook

They reopened the door so that these specters could go back to their world
Some of them even apologized and said good night and told the boys good luck
Rob, Todd and Steve though naïve the halfwits knew they were in deep shit
Because their mom was a former monster mobster savage who didn’t give a fuck