deepundergroundpoetry.com
Early Winter
The cold of death unwarmed by fire,
Stokes burning where life, where breath,
Now perspired, has left.
The touch of death, cold and calling,
Sows love to fall upon the earth,
Sows seeds of strength to rise from their last breath.
To part respects and prayer in autumns offering
To the altar of their birth and flare,
To a backwards stare down the road of an early winter's long despair.
Where no hope nor promise,
Where no safe harbour can ease or spare,
The hold of a love, stripped raw and bare.
Stokes burning where life, where breath,
Now perspired, has left.
The touch of death, cold and calling,
Sows love to fall upon the earth,
Sows seeds of strength to rise from their last breath.
To part respects and prayer in autumns offering
To the altar of their birth and flare,
To a backwards stare down the road of an early winter's long despair.
Where no hope nor promise,
Where no safe harbour can ease or spare,
The hold of a love, stripped raw and bare.
Written by
Fiftysevenhours
Published 30th Oct 2021
Author's Note
Written in response to the Eldim video Tru: https://youtu.be/V1Hs6-JRzAE
I've overlooked much of the ancestral and cultural history that Rian mentions but the tale of the video to me as it stands at the moment.
I've overlooked much of the ancestral and cultural history that Rian mentions but the tale of the video to me as it stands at the moment.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 8
reading list entries 2
comments 12
reads 784
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re. Early Winter
30th Oct 2021 6:43pm
There is a singular gravity your writing which is all your own, a signature of your presence on the page. You consistently have command of your flow, pace and details, which allows the writing to blossom in the mind's eye. This is a poignant piece and it's good to see your writing again.
1
Re: Re. Early Winter
1st Nov 2021 2:53pm
Re. Early Winter
This piece paints a very distinct picture for me. There is no tripping over words to get to the meaning. It flows so easily and reads so beautifully.
Good luck in the comp.
Good luck in the comp.
1
Re: Re. Early Winter
1st Nov 2021 2:57pm
Re. Early Winter
Your words are dancing and spinning right in my direction. I get this. I see it. Its deep for me. Thank you! <3
1
Re: Re. Early Winter
1st Nov 2021 2:58pm
Re. Early Winter
1st Nov 2021 2:34am
Re: Re. Early Winter
1st Nov 2021 2:59pm
Re. Early Winter
1st Nov 2021 2:52am
this reads so beautifully. I echo everything eerie said up above. well done.
1
Re: Re. Early Winter
1st Nov 2021 3:00pm
Re. Early Winter
2nd Apr 2022 2:16pm
What a captivating piece, Fiftysevenhours. Especially in imagery - that final line - oOF! Who hasn't experienced that metaphorically and physically in a lifetime? I am feeling heartbreak and bare trees, still clinging to the earth despite the harshness of cold stripping their branches clean.
While I realize this isn't a NaPo poem, I did want you to know how strongly I feel you've exited the gate in the challenge. I look forward to reading your entries and crossing the finish line with you.
While I realize this isn't a NaPo poem, I did want you to know how strongly I feel you've exited the gate in the challenge. I look forward to reading your entries and crossing the finish line with you.
1
Re: Re. Early Winter
2nd Apr 2022 2:53pm
Appreciated Ahavati, I look forward to the crossing with you and the others too should the journey be so blessed. Safe journeys!