Dear Douchebag

Your fucking cum stains still on my dirty clothes.That I procrastinate washing so I have a source of focus when I'm masturbating because only the thought of your degradation can gratify me. And I need to cope or I'll use drugs. What a shitty DBT skill. How fucking disgusting am I right to still worship you in your absence when you're unworthy of the aftermath of cum! White, is the crotch of my black underwear, the inside of my bodysuits and black jeans. What use to be so romantic has turned into something that couldn't be more repulsive. Never have I been more embarrassed to even be capable of orgasm. Shit I didn't hit this low when my birth father was screwing me. Not to mention all the permanent scars and discoloration from you marking your territory still on my pale ass. The self harm scars from your psychological abuse that scream happy anniversary. Your Eternity collar locked on my stupid fucking neck that another Dom from fet has to buy an Allen wrench for me to remove because I gave all my money to you. I would have rather you just snapped my neck honestly. Have mercy. And to come to the realization that I begged to be a pay pig because I devalued money and knew you needed more for your future than I did because mine seemed so bleak. How dare you be granted with such power? Out of all the things you could choose to do with a human life. Your deplorable ass chooses to destroy it. How facetious of you. And to think that sometimes I reminisce about the trauma you gave me and I miss it. What the fuck is wrong with me? The best parts of myself the best years of my youth now belong to you. Congratulations! What a dumb cunt I was to have the audacity to need your guidance and authority.