deepundergroundpoetry.com
Girl
She walks underneath the sheen
Night fall
Night ache
And a thousand more deserts she cannot understand
Hearing
Foreign voices
Echoing off a rock
Hearing
But not seeing
A star drop
There had been a wind
It had passed over her body like petals
It had touched her so delicately
She had missed its presence
Unable to even entertain
The notion of more
Night fall
Night ache
And a thousand more deserts she cannot understand
Hearing
Foreign voices
Echoing off a rock
Hearing
But not seeing
A star drop
There had been a wind
It had passed over her body like petals
It had touched her so delicately
She had missed its presence
Unable to even entertain
The notion of more
Published 18th Jun 2021
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likes 9
reading list entries 5
comments 6
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The author encourages honest critique.
18th Jun 2021 5:42am
Dear J,
Stunning vista of a write. I thought and found my thoughts taking this walk with this heroine.
I really enjoy the night and I thought this phrase was particularly thoughtful “ Night fall
Night ache” because for all the reasons I love night time there is an ache just underneath that love. Beautifully touching poem. H🌷
Stunning vista of a write. I thought and found my thoughts taking this walk with this heroine.
I really enjoy the night and I thought this phrase was particularly thoughtful “ Night fall
Night ache” because for all the reasons I love night time there is an ache just underneath that love. Beautifully touching poem. H🌷
18th Jun 2021 1:53pm
18th Jun 2021 2:38pm
18th Jun 2021 4:22pm
Nice to see you posting, Jenn. The imagery in this, particulary the hearing but not seeing a star drop, was excellent. There's a melancholic nature about this one; an essence of resolve in circumstance, I am picking up. A sitting or standing still. Who knows what comes next. Hopefully, beautiful poetry.
29th Jun 2021 5:17pm
"Hearing
But not seeing
A star drop"
~a hush of awe at this poetic jewel!
That wind, may it caress you, even when u dont know u need it. until u dont. huggins for ur strength in face of all things a~changin. This is beautiful in its baring.
i love you Creampuff,
~d
But not seeing
A star drop"
~a hush of awe at this poetic jewel!
That wind, may it caress you, even when u dont know u need it. until u dont. huggins for ur strength in face of all things a~changin. This is beautiful in its baring.
i love you Creampuff,
~d
11th Jul 2021 5:16pm
and ..the Nature Power within Her ..is Godform .carrying her in all elegance in adverse traverse too .. extreme are the ways of this flowing river over watev terrain..a pathway so ease she forms ..& yes the. soft winds whispers mellifluous ..fuelling her.. #juz me Jen.yoyr words dig deep n ev in awe, as it syncs in me & takes me der instant in all feel .. light love ev dwar xx
