WHAT CAN BE DONE?

That is true in so many ways, JZ.

Thank you very much, Ahavati, for your very kind comment. I see the contents of this poem in our daily life.

You have such a compelling writing style.

Thank you very much, Lozzamus. Your highly appreciated encouragement means a lot to me.

Deixis deixis everywhere
with missing articles to boot,
and commas used
in places where they should not go,
and grammar gaffes
in how some plural verbs
do not agree in number with
the subject of this writing’s lines.
And then didacticism swerves in
at the end and rears
its pompous head
This writing is a mangled hoot.


But more importantly,
the meaning of this piece
is hardly clear because
its wording is inscrutable

For instance, there’s the reference to
a group of people's  “self remorse”.

Is not the phrase
a notable redundancy?
Remorse is always
something personal, one’s own
and does not need to have its referent  
described.


And if we see what rules of syntax bids us do
i.e., to see the phrase must mean
 “remorse of self”,
should then we all agree
that what is referenced by the phrase
are guilty, brooding,  feelings of regret
for being who it is one’s always been
and who one is?

Nonsense as long as the pretender doesn't specify the mistakes.

So this means that what your sycophants say about your piece is nonsense since one  doesn't specify any of the "many ways" in which he thinks your piece is "true", let alone the particular "truths"  your piece supposedly lays out  and the other doesn't say  what it is about your "style" of writing that is "compelling"     
        
And I DID specify  an  instance of where what you intended to convey was unclear (i.e., the expression "self remorse").  Funny that you ignored responding to that.    
   
But as to some specifics:    
   
The comma after "mind" in this line    
   
"but he had a small mind, and numb heart".    
   
is misplaced and unnecessary since you are not noting a series of the things that your muscled man  possessed.  And you should have written "and A numb heart" for the line to be grammatically correct.    
   
The statement that    
   
"A girl shouted for help and he heard,    
blindly rushed with the crowds to her side".    
   
Is unclear since there's no indication of what the girl needed help for, and the statement itself  is muddled and question making.  Did the muscled man really "blindly" rush to where the girl was?  Did he not have a reason for doing so (i.e., he wanted to see what was causing her to cry out)? Did you mean "hurriedly"?    
   
Moreover, you should have written    
   
Hearing a girl cry out for help,    
he, along with a curious crowd,    
rushed to her side.    
   
This makes far more sense than your lines do, is far more grammatically sound than your lines presently are, and avoids the deictic expression "the (which?) crowd".    
   
Furthermore,  it is wholly unclear what the girl who cried out for help wanted revenge for, let alone whether she was justified in wanting it and upon whom she wanted revenge extracted.  
 
And the expression "cruel on" is a solecism.  One is "cruel to" another, not "cruel on".

"but he had a small mind, and numb heart."
1-The comma before AND is correct. It is a series of enumeration of two words, which you can join with comma+ and. Here you can join them with comma or without it as they are the last two words.
2- According to AND A NUMB HEART, The repeated items after , AND can be omitted because A is used wit A SMALL MIND, so there is no necessity to repeat A with a numb heart.
3- l am sorry for CRUEL. It should be followed by TO.
4-BTW, you've made a mistake in your quotation "A girl shouted.......to her side." You place the full stop after the speech marks. It must be before them because the meaning inside the speech marks is full. Thank you for your great interest, Baldwin.
5- please correct DIECTIC.

"BTW, you've made a mistake in your quotation "A girl shouted.......to her side." You place the full stop after the speech marks. It must be before them because the meaning inside the speech marks is full".      
      
Since I was quoting something you wrote [which is not someone's speech], the full stop outside of the **quotation** marks that I used to signify that the words within them were yours is appropriate.     
     
In any case, leave it to you to focus on matters trivial and to prescind from speaking directly to the points I made about the linguistic awkwardness  of what I quoted and how it doesn't say what you were apparently trying to say.      
     
BTW,  did you mean "a series of nominations"[full stop]?  "a series of nomination of two words" is not only a solecism;  it also does not describe what your series is, since, as Longman nots "nomination"  means:    
   
   
1 ...  the act of officially suggesting someone or something for a position, duty, or prize, or the fact of being suggested for it    
   
      Who will get the Republican nomination for president?    
      All the committee’s nominations were approved.    
   
2  the name of a book, film, actor etc that has been suggested to receive an honour or prize    
   
      The nominations for the Academy Awards were announced    
      Tuesday.    
   
3  the act of giving someone a particular job, or the fact of being given that job    
   
https://www.ldoceonline.com/dictionary/nomination  
   
And given that you separate the phrases "small mind"  and "numb heart" with a comma,  the "a" of the first phrase does not apply to the second phrase.  
 
Note what Grammarly says about how your doing so is a mistake:  
 
Comma Between Two Nouns in a Compound Subject or Object  
Don’t separate two nouns that appear together as a compound subject or compound object.  
 
Incorrect  Cleo, and her band will be playing at Dockside Diner next  
             Friday.  
Correct     Cleo and her band will be playing at Dockside Diner next  
             Friday.  
Incorrect  Cleo will wear a sparkly red blazer, and high heels.  
Correct     Cleo will wear a sparkly red blazer and high heels.  
 
 When a subject or object is made up of two items and the second item is parenthetical, you can set off the second item with commas—one before it and one after it. But you don’t need a comma when you’re simply listing two items.  
 
https://www.grammarly.com/blog/comma/

Before l answer you, l would say that your first paragraph is not correct. Please have another look at it.

What's not correct about it?

No, it is not appropriate. Quotation is quotation.
Why didn't you answer no 5?

Why didn't you answer no 5?

Was #5 a question?

Why are you still focusing on trivial matters and avoiding the substantial ones?

Because you insist on trivial matters and leave the essentials. Why don't you appreciate the poetical ideas before looking at a mistake here or there? There is no one who is perfect. Have you ever thought that your poetry is perfect?

What poetical ideas?

What I think about the nature of what I write has nothing to do with whether my claims that your piece is disjointed, poorly written,  and  often unintelligible are on the mark, let alone only focused on trivialities.  
 
BTW, what kind of English is "Because you insist on trivial matters .." given that "insist on"  means "To need **to do** a particular thing, in spite of others' annoyance or discouragement" , "To require or dictate that something happen"; "to demand something"?

Will a man with a mind that is numb
be moved into rescuing action
by a loud shout for help that he hears
or will he act like the bum that he is
and respond not to heart wrenching cries?

And why would he want to make efforts
to save any girl whose loud pleas  for salvation
were forked-tongued creations
and nothing but vengeance filled lies?

I told you why in the poem. It's very obvious. Don't you understand poetry, dear poet?

Leaving aside the question of what a "poetical idea" is or what it is that makes an idea (a conception existing in the mind as a result of mental understanding, awareness, or activity). "poetical",  are you now claiming that one could find a "poetical idea" in your piece?   If so, where does it appear?  
 
By the way, I did not ask WHY there is a "poetical idea" in your piece.  I asked whether and where it contained any.

So once again, you have misread what I wrote and failed to answer what I asked of you.

I have an idea for a poem.    
But the problem that’s here    
is the fact that unless      
it’s something expressed
upon a page      
in words well set out    
to be metrical    
and lines  that are full of evocative    
sensory images,    
it’s a bodiless, vacuous ghost,      
and by nature wholly  unclear    
that it is, or can be, poetical.