Losing My V-Card (Part 1)

December 15, 2010

Losing My V-Card (Part 1)
He gives me a kiss on the cheek and tells me “You look pretty”.  
“Thanks” I already know this can you tell me something else?
He looks into my eyes and tries to connect, “I love your amber eyes,
they are deep Justina, but I love looking into them. I get lost, I really do.”

I felt that in my lady parts, “I like that you get lost in my eyes.”
He places his hand on my leg, “I like that you wore a skirt today”.
Obviously, easier access and I am ready, “I wore it for you”.

We are at his parent’s house, sitting in the living room.
He leans in and kisses me, grabs my hand, leading me to the bedroom.
No one home, easy to find the moments to get a quick one in.
It is a rumor that I slept with a few guys; rumors, where do I begin?
Still never having had sex with a boy, I was unsure he believed me.
I was scared and was worried that he would just trash me.
He closed the door, and I felt the click and turning of the lock in my soul.
I told myself if ever a guy, him, I really care for him, he makes me whole.

He looked at me and probably noticed my insecurity, “You cool T?”
No, I am freaking out, “Yeah, I’m just nervous because I haven’t done this before.”
I wait to see if he believes me, “I know, I love you, and I want to physically show you.”
His father being a gynecologist I bet he does, Casanova, “I love you too”, I think.

I sit on the edge of his bed, looking around his meticulously organized teenage pad.
His room is neater than mine, maybe he is this genuine soul, he is pretty rad.
I know we have only been dating for 6 months but I have known him a couple of years.
He is a sweet guy who has broken a couple of hearts, I guess that is my fear.
I do not want a broken heart; this will tie me to him forever.
Could I survive this, if and when he breaks my heart, will I get over it ever?
Anyway, I love him, this is love because I feel sad when he is not around.
He sneaks into my room, he kisses me in front of everyone, hugs me I am down,
he gives me room to breathe, he is smart, he has the sexiest lips, his eyes penetrate.
Soon his other thing will too, I hope he knows I wish to abdicate.
I do not want to just get groped and rubbed today, he has to know this.
I do not want to say it, start caressing me and I will not stop you, give me a kiss.
He walks over to me and sit next to me, “Do you want to me to play music?”
I do not know, you have done this before, so stop asking.  “That sounds nice.”    
He plays soft music, and gives me a lustful look “You’re really beautiful T.”
That is what all boys say to girls they want to fuck.  “You just wanna sex me up.”
He looks at me with small disbelief that I do not believe him.  “Really?”
I smack my teeth and try to play off the insecurity, “I mean, you’re a guy.”
He sits next to me and passionately kisses me, “I love you Justina Luz”
He kisses me on my ear, and I melt as usual, we have been here before.
For some reason, the idea of a guy touching me made me feel like a whore.
Not this time, though he has touched me before, this time I felt different.
His AXE scent is really playing on my senses, that stimulating scent.
He lies me back gently, hovering over me like a caring, horny teenager.
Just like everyone says, orgasms usually do not happen the first time, I’ll wager.
Written by Just_Writing
Author's Note
I lost my virginity in 12th grade couple of months before my 18th birthday. Over the summer we started dating, he moved into my neighborhood end of 11th grade. I got know him better though I'd...
I lost my virginity in 12th grade couple of months before my 18th birthday. Over the summer we started dating, he moved into my neighborhood end of 11th grade. I got know him better though I'd known him since 10th grade. Not the first boy I dated or kissed, but my first guy. I was told by a few girls that they didn't reach an orgasm., that as on my mind too. I decided to split it into two because it is a lengthy diary entry. I have italicized myself and bolded him for clarity on what you just read. It isn't the pure conversation but a summary. We talked a lot more, hard to capture so I did the jist. I just added the thoughts, wanted to try something. Sorry if this was a hard piece for you to read.
Thank you for reading.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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