Inner Hell

" She feared the things she wanted, and wanted the things she feared. "
- Minette Walters

 His genesis came from my inner hell
Horror given life
His shadows anchoring themselves to my ankles
My demons playing for control

Villains originating buried in my wounds
Burrowed in the depths of a putrid pit
like scavenging maggots
Seeking more and more death

A pursuit of agony on an endless loop
Sanity running out of time

Cracks like spiderwebs claiming its meal
Exposing my personal hell again and again

Promiscuity a tool to create something from nothing
Exploiting my heartbreak
Gambling away with personal shame

Frigid self- harm born from desperation to feel something different
Urgently running from anguish
Needing to stop the ache for adoration

Disrespecting a survival instinct deep within my brain

Disturbing reality created from a personal inner hell
Nightmares color many private moments
Spent alone with the king of my hell
Finding mercy in the unconscious nights beneath the nights glitter

Sinister beauty in infected hidden wounds
A dark hope found in the savage passion that
Spoke of destruction, violence and desire