I remember

"A People who dont know there history...Is like a Tree without roots" Marcus Garvey.

So Here I am...making  a declaritive statement inside my mind,
on who I am.
on who I was raised to be.
on who I WANT to be.

Yet truth of self never seems to come easily
As there are times that I feel like a Motherless child
OH.. but wait... a Motherless Child is exactly what I am
Considering... My History...see my mother killed her self
When I was only 16...
I remember laying face down ... on the dirt...
I could not believe how this hurt...
and yet...even that pain...I will not allow it to define me.

Although I can not yet put this pain behind me.
There is a lesson learned here.
I will not live inside my mind.
I will not live my life in fear.

Yes self truth never comes easy,
as I regard myself with careful eyes
through the mirror. Careful not to
look to deeply into my own soul,
So I dont have to be cut by the sharpness
Of my own memories....

I have fancied getting a tatoo of an Egyptian Cat
To symbolize the lives I have lived...after 7 foster homes
with coountless tales of abuse ....
I look at yet another lesson learned:
Every closed Eye aint sleep...as I have prayed to  The Lord
My soul to keep....
I wonder.... back then when I was loosing everything
Including my mind...Did God check his messages everyday,
Or were my prayers just sitting in the Divine In Box?

So I digress...If I am to become who I am supposed to be
Then what of my past...then what Of my History..
What do I do with the pain...how do I obtain a new philosophy..
About Life.....
You see... I am NOT a rootless tree
My roots run deep,because of the pain I've gone through,and
Because of promises others did not keep
I am fortified in strength...my future is pristine
My soul is Like a sponge.....
I remember Everything.

Even after my storms....I learned that the sun is never far behind
I have also learned that a soul is only broken if it believes
It is in the mind.

My life is a masala of experiences: hopes, dreams, pains and fears.
I know I was destined to succeed, because I remember..
Everything.