deepundergroundpoetry.com
Phoenix
From the wall of the closest dock
to the furthest traveller's point
I would run to know freedom here.
Time,
it ticks so steadily, so patient as it waits on me,
there are days I forget it waits for no one.
There are check lists
sitting unmarked in my drawer, not for fear of wanting
but liable time, as I hate to let down others.
What of a weekend on the closest dock
or the furthest traveller's point?
Will freedom wait?
Maybe I'll write about it,
when those lonely hours pass and I can't motivate the flight. I become a shell,
built with letters and painted with words and destroyed by strangers passing on the damaged street.
to the furthest traveller's point
I would run to know freedom here.
Time,
it ticks so steadily, so patient as it waits on me,
there are days I forget it waits for no one.
There are check lists
sitting unmarked in my drawer, not for fear of wanting
but liable time, as I hate to let down others.
What of a weekend on the closest dock
or the furthest traveller's point?
Will freedom wait?
Maybe I'll write about it,
when those lonely hours pass and I can't motivate the flight. I become a shell,
built with letters and painted with words and destroyed by strangers passing on the damaged street.
Published 12th Feb 2012
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
13th Feb 2012 2:20am
LA
First of all the title. It's a world
within itself-Phoenix. I wanted to see
your take.
:)Not many writers I know can come
across as ones with their school of
poetry.
You have. The voice thru out every single
one of your poems is uniform and the entropy
is at balance. And that's an achievement-in
my words a major achhievement.
This one here was no different.
The repeation works wonders. The first and
the forth-the question and the answer.
The last stanza nailed it. Sheer joy when
I wait with bated breath what's in store
at the very end.:) This was beautiful,
especially the last line.
Curtsy,
S'
p.s- An article before 'fear of wanting'
First of all the title. It's a world
within itself-Phoenix. I wanted to see
your take.
:)Not many writers I know can come
across as ones with their school of
poetry.
You have. The voice thru out every single
one of your poems is uniform and the entropy
is at balance. And that's an achievement-in
my words a major achhievement.
This one here was no different.
The repeation works wonders. The first and
the forth-the question and the answer.
The last stanza nailed it. Sheer joy when
I wait with bated breath what's in store
at the very end.:) This was beautiful,
especially the last line.
Curtsy,
S'
p.s- An article before 'fear of wanting'
13th Feb 2012 9:04am
