you were not alone

vivid as if I was still there,
i remember your face
the last moments you had are moments I can’t erase
i don’t know who you were, young man in the red polo
i just know your death was no way for a person to go
we pressed on your chest, tried to get air in your lungs
two fingers on your wrist praying for a thump
your eyes started to close and we felt our hearts drop
until help arrived we still didn’t stop
pressing on your chest, pumping air in your lungs
i held your hand and prayed
and prayed that help would come

a strange color blue
that was foreign to me
your limp hand in mine I continued to squeeze

maybe if you felt the squeeze, you wouldn’t let go
if I prayed hard enough, mercy would be shown
if we helped your heart beat, then it could restart
our hope for you continued to grow

but reality set in
the hope wasn’t enough
it would eventually tear us apart

i learned today that death isn’t black
it’s not rainy days and thunder and crows
it isn’t dark nights and black umbrellas
it’s not the symbols of sorrow

it’s a young man in a red polo
pale blue, scarlet red
sun shining with a mid afternoon breeze
it’s driving down a road, off work feeling of relief
tragedy strikes in the blink of an eye
of course i knew this
but didn’t feel the impact
until I saw you
die

you deserved better than us, young man in the red polo
i can only now hope you’re in a place
where peace is bestowed