It's great to be alive

It's odd how you're past those thoughts but they're never done with you.
You always see it as an option, most propable too.
You wanna live and see and feel but you ending it soon is even more real.
I got everything I want, I'm the happiest I've ever been. So why does my brain keep reminding me
of how I used to feel?
I'm terrified of my own mind, am I ever safe? What if I'm laughing now and the next second a criminal case? Do I ever win this only-one-player race?
I try to breathe, I try to count, I try to keep my feet touching the ground. But all that can work if my mind isn't around.
I'm scared to tell anyone. How could they take it? How could they believe I wouldn't take my promise and just break it.
Will I love life but hating breathing for the rest of my life? Can I ever be 100% confident in saying ''it's great to be alive''?
Written by fightorflight (Disa)
Author's Note
Small piece I wrote a little while back to let out my steam
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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