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maybe it's an accidental accent, shock, or why EMT's are always so handsome.

(i.)
July 2019   † †  
† † † † † † †  
†† † † † † † †  
it's searing and bone protruding † † † † † † † † † †  
eyes blinded, bloody † † † † † † † † † † †
shards of glass and encroaching fear † †
red, blue, and yellowish-white lights blur † †
a language I can't quite understand † †
or an†accent maybe † †
cold, so cold - like Ohio, when I was small † †
Am I frozen? † †  
Maybe I was dreaming of long ago...? † †
Then I tried to move † †
my legs work, my fingers move † †
my arms and head † †
wait, wait. .... not my head † †
why can't I move my.... † † † † † † † † † †  
My FACE † † † † † † † † † †  
only partly, I try to talk † † † † † † † † † †  
shock was setting in, I could tell † † † † † † † † † † †
I've experienced it one other time...  
It's like when you close your eyes † † † † † † † † † † †
but can still see the sunlight behind them † † †  
darkness starts to seal out reality † † † † † † † † † †  
I need to calm down..be calm and breathe
I could see a bit of movement at my rightó †  
the look of abject horror † † † † † † † † † †
on a complete strangers face † † † † † † † † † †
or Jensen Ackles' face ? † † † † † † † † †
what's Dean doing here? † † † † † † † † †
even steeped †
in a new look of determined terror †
just.†so. hot. † † † † † † †  
like an archangel † † † † † † †
and there was that screaming again † † † † † † †
so LOUDLY! † † † † † † † † † †
Oh, just be quiet, † † † † † † † †  
we're all trying to sleep here
... † † † † † † † † † †
His voice was so annoying and nonstop † †  
I wanted to yell † † † † † † † † †  
Shut. The. Fuck. Up. † † † † † † † † † † †
I tried to scream "Just ANSWER HIM!!!"  
to get it to stop † † † † † † †  
when I focused again, † † † † † † † † † † †
from my darkened side of "internal sunshine"
there it was again † † † † † † †  
that annoying voice, again.. and again † † †  
now it seemed, it was attached † † † † † † † †  
to Jensen/Dean's face † † † † † † † † †
the annoying screaming guy, (Dean) † † † † † † † †  
he was talking to me † † † † † † † † † † †
me? † † † † † † † † † † †
why me
? † † † † † † † † † † †
I'm just comfortably resting and waiting †  
for the sun to warm me † † † † † † † † † † †
So tired, so so very tired † † †  
I'm tired beyond measure † † † † † † † †  
I don't think I've ever been more tired in my life † † † † † † † †
† † † † † † † † †
I'll just close my eyes for a bit...
† † † † † † †  
† † † † † † † †
† † † † † † † †
† † † † † † † †
† † † † † † † †
to be cont'd...
Bluevelvete
Written by Bluevelvete
Published | Edited 15th Jun 2021
Author's Note
real murky memories from a true story of a car accident that had me go through the windshield, when an air bag didn't fully deploy.....
tough stuff to write, I tend to lighten it a bit
©Blu2021
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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