deepundergroundpoetry.com

Depth of Rage

I hate the feeling of sitting in pain
Alone, practically topless in a hospital gown and cold
So fucking cold that I use my flannel to cover my feet
Trembling in stress and fear of what it could be
Has death finally come for me at last?
My mind can't help but play in a loop
The idea of ripping out the iv and running
That lovely thought of escape beeping alongside
The machine monitoring my erratic vitals
Reminding me that I'm still very much alive
The rage of being alone and hurt building;
Boiling, bubbling and snapping deep inside
Griping my fists; my nails into my palm
Wanting to lash out at something, anything
As if I had that energy to spare so I watch
As my cellphone dies like a countdown to the end
The number going down and down right with my patience
My mind digs in its heels trying to not spiral
With thoughts of what I did to deserve this
Anger at how slow the healing process is
And the fucking beeping machine driving my fury higher
As my mind sinks into a soft kind of despair
Tittering on acceptance and fighting it
Wanting to die in one breathe and wanting to live in another
Having no idea what to do in the silent loudness
Of quietly sitting alone in an er with my fear dipped rage
Written by BlueBeastGirl (Beasty)
Published
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 4 reading list entries 2
comments 3 reads 298
Commenting Preference: 
The author encourages honest critique.

Latest Forum Discussions
COMPETITIONS
Today 4:56am by NANCY_RDZ_STORIES
SPEAKEASY
Today 4:15am by Grace
SPEAKEASY
Today 3:33am by DCLXVI_1989
COMPETITIONS
Today 00:41am by Louismatteo349
SPEAKEASY
Yesterday 11:19pm by Ahavati
POETRY
Yesterday 11:05pm by Grace