Who is your first love?

Honestly, I don't know the answer to that
My first kiss was an accident with my best friend Tina
She ran away and never talked to me again
And I loved her so much and so dearly
I just didn't know if I meant to kiss her or not
I had a weakness for a boy named Sawyer
But was that a crush or a longing for a friend?
Then there was my first boyfriend; James  
And I didn't reallly have a choice in that
And I know I didn't love him that way
So that counts him out of the running, right?
Then there was Logan that I've this thing for
This ever lasting thing for and no matter how hard I try
I can't seem to erase him from my mind
And I've never been able to tell him how much I loved him
Or still love him but I've let that go
And then Johnny... The man who crushed me like a bug
And I could go on and on about that but I'm not
Then there was Jordan and she loved me back
I just don't know what first even means...
Then there is Daishawn, my longest love affair
Someone I've also had to let go when I didn't want to...  
Even though it broke my heart over and over again
First love... Is such a weird thing
I've had so many firsts in my life when it comes to it
And it leaves craters on my heart changing it forever
My heart must look like the moon with how many firsts have hit me