I wake up in a foggy ocean, feeling neither cold nor hot
I lie there for an hour, floating. . .
My mind swirling lethargically as my unused heart slowly rots.
The dull eyes in the sockets of my mind, opened, yet they see no thing.
Others, close-by, rush around in the far distance
And I remain horizontal as the sounds warp and distort.
And then, I hear a knock.

I apply my makeup and ready my voice prior to answering,
And then with a cheerful smile, I reply
Oh! Haha! I overslept, it seems. Come in!

I go throughout the hours, having a wonderful day,
Yet I can't help to feel some anxiety
For all it'd take would be a guy to view closely my eye,
See through to my grey soul and uncover my lie.

I've much to do, come on now, I must move!
Hmm, no, I don't want you to.
No, please! At least give me motivation!
You're pushing your luck. The best I can give is cunctation.[/i
You're meant to work for me! Look, all I need is energy!
[i]I am you, daft fuck! Now lie low; life bloody sucks.

This is unfair! Why must I pretend when many out there rarely descend‽

It's just how life is, now smile, it's time leave the house.
Swiftly now, you wouldn't want to upset others with your being morose.
You must keep up appearances, vessel; later, you may again hide away like mouse.
I'll do you a nicety and buy a bottle of gin
Perhaps then you'll find it easier to grin.
Just be sure not to overdose,
Because if you think we're near the end,
HAHAHA! We're NOWHERE fucking close!

. . .

All I want to currently do is lie here.
Just sleep, listen to music, and forget about the world;
Just fade away forever, disappear;
Let my soul ascend to a mournful skirl.
People claim there's purpose to why we're present
But sometimes I can't help but question the validity.
Sometimes I feel that meaning has become obsolete and senescent.
Honesty, maybe it'd be better to rapidly increase entropy?

But, no, no, I mustn't think like that.
I ought to, on my face, put my mask back
And TRY to push through my dark, mental self-attack.


Fucking hell, it's hard not to crack.

If I'm correct and life has no worthwhile purpose,
Then please bury my husk 6 feet down, under the Scirpus.
What's this? I'm smiling now‽
Haha! No, surely not, is this for real?
Oh, damn, I am! But what the heck? How‽
Wait, I still feel numb. . . Man, I was excited to finally feel.

I guess. . .
I managed to fool even myself.
Well, at least instead of reality, my illusions, others will notice.
But for now, I'm at home, all alone, and can leave my mask on the shelf.
Written by Narocia (Tesana)
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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