DROWNING

 
Love made me a lunatic and I'm still stuck with no solution so I'm strung out and I'm losing it
I'm crushed from confusion, I swear I'm sick of all this stupid shit
Influenced from the milligrams so usually I'm super lit
Ruining my life abusing drugs tryna hide the damage
I swear it's harder to survive when everything you loved has vanished
Everyday is crazy, tell me how's a man supposed to manage
Especially when everybody lied and left me stranded
Hold myself responsible for taking you for granted
Still in disbelief I did that shit, I'll never understand it
Karma's catching up with me and left me at a disadvantage
I'm watching as the curtains close, already wasted all my chances
I'm standing empty handed and I'm too hurt to hide
I search but never find, becoming numb
I'm indecisive cause I can't make up my mind
I never smile, nothing excites me
No excitement hoping that my name ain't on indictments
Everyday's a struggle and I gotta get from A to B
But I'm steadily going under, somebody save me from me
Stress plus my stomach's empty, the reason why I play for keeps
To say the least I need a cigarette, my nerves shot
I swear lately it's been fucked up, I been dope sick with no luck
I'm down bad but I won't fold up
Nobody likes me and I don't give a fuck
I'll try my best to bounce back when I'm up against the wall
Drugs help to ease the pain but either way I lost it all
I can only blame myself it ain't no one else's fault
From time to time I stumble but I never fumble the ball
But motherfuckers selfish, they don't care if you fall
I hear no evil speak none either, never saying what I saw
In all actuality the fact of the matters this
I'm far from happy, all my hopes have been shattered quick
What the hell is happening?
I'm lost in the madness and my happiness was murdered by the tears on my mattress
Nonstop nightmares, the pain runs deep
Had my heart broken like the cracks in the concrete
I'm drowning now and drowning more by the minute
My habits outta hand and I need help, I admit it
Lines of the powder got me out here slipping
I've made too many mistakes, I should of went with my intuition
Mama always said I'm hard headed and never listen now I gotta pay the price
I bow my head as I pray I make it through another night