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Broken Down Souls
You are the worst part of that I hold within myself, the part of my soul I wish would die.
I have your eyes, my mother says ; I look just like you.
I hold your anger inside my soul like a fire of a thousand suns balled into one.
I hold your pain upon my shoulders as if you are sitting upon my chest.
I sometimes wish I'd had the father all the other girls got to have ; A good father.
Someone to go to dances with, and Have tea parties at dawn.
But instead I got you, and instead of tea parties I get manipulative phone calls,
And broken doors, and broken souls.
I wanted to believe in you so badly, after all you were my daddy.
I was your little girl, but I wasn't enough for you.
You are the worst part of myself I couldn't ever seem to get rid of,
No matter how hard i'd try, you'd always show up to ruin some part in my life.
I hold you deep within the caverns of my soul,
And push you away so much I forget that you are a part of me.
Because all I'd ever wanted was a father,
But You; You ruined me.
And perhaps when you were younger, that was all you'd ever wanted too.
I have your eyes, my mother says ; I look just like you.
I hold your anger inside my soul like a fire of a thousand suns balled into one.
I hold your pain upon my shoulders as if you are sitting upon my chest.
I sometimes wish I'd had the father all the other girls got to have ; A good father.
Someone to go to dances with, and Have tea parties at dawn.
But instead I got you, and instead of tea parties I get manipulative phone calls,
And broken doors, and broken souls.
I wanted to believe in you so badly, after all you were my daddy.
I was your little girl, but I wasn't enough for you.
You are the worst part of myself I couldn't ever seem to get rid of,
No matter how hard i'd try, you'd always show up to ruin some part in my life.
I hold you deep within the caverns of my soul,
And push you away so much I forget that you are a part of me.
Because all I'd ever wanted was a father,
But You; You ruined me.
And perhaps when you were younger, that was all you'd ever wanted too.
Published 11th Oct 2020
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