Not Yet .....

i've been wrestling with  
ANGER  
(most) not my own  
thinking about where
to drip  
to drop  
my ink  
(into)  
my home.  
 
i'm not certain You understand  
how an empath soaks up emotion  
 
treading in the deep  
end of the pond  
mold - black some blue  
some green, red  
 
 
i am still trying to Heal  
to get better than before. . .  
 
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
 
oh my effin godless me!  
i detest when the unhealed causes me to strike back.  
 
my spirit weakens;  
i am full of Forest Fired smoke and furor  
 
in retrospsect  
i WANT TO BE BETTER  
i WANT TO NEVER  
i NEED TO understand  
coping with their lack of healing  
hoping i can withstand the lies  
&  
scale the same plane  
 
maybe even find a point  
where we can see  
eye-to-eye without strain  
malice and deceptive  
fallace  
 
**************************  
i have always loved her Poetry.  
i know she dislikes me for reasons  
only she harbors but her poetry  
has ever spoken to my Spirit!  
* Missy ( https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/poets/Miss_Sub/ )