From Afar

Hey Nikki... this is a really longing and emotional spill. I feel you. Growing up in a dysfunctional family, where we never had much of a sense of family, and then later getting to be a part of a much more loving, functional family really made me realize what I'd missed out on earlier in my life. I remember feeling so weird and out of place... the experience was so different from the ones with my own family, that it felt foreign. I know it's not quite the same... at all, but I hope you can feel the love of this 'family' at DUP *hugs*

My family sucks. I am always invited to every friend I haves gatherings. I never go.
I feel out of place, and so I just watch from afar. I cant get comfortable no matter how long ive known my friend and their family.  
Pisses me off. Wish I could learn to apart of something.  

Seems like its the same to me. Thank you NB

Awww, Nikki. I'm sorry... I hope someday you can find a place where you feel loved and comfortable, without all the awkwardness that comes with it *hugs*

Thank you.
I'm super aloof either born or made that way but it helps. 😂😂

Wow ... this one has me crying ... I can feel all of it ... I can so relate with my own f'ed up family ... bold and vulnerable write ... picture is truly haunting ... love your authenticity ...

Thank you.
The TV lied.
Grandmas aren't all sweet
Dads arent witty hard workers
and moms well hell they're nothing
like the TV wants the world to think
they are.
Thank you LDF ❤❤

Dear N,

Great Dickens’ reference and the overwhelming feeling of desperation. Family. You can’t makeup some of the oddities endured with them. The worst and saddest part is the life long baggage carried around as fallout from the dynamics of family relationships. Fantastic write expressing this. H🌷

I got so used to being alone
well not alone yet no blood DNA match anywhere that I cannot do holidays
with other families.  Shit even a dinner on Wednesday at Christinas aunt Marys give me the awkward anxiety. Even though I know they love me and care. So fuckin weird.  Thank you Honoria.

Bless and love ...

Thank you FeNyX❤❤❤

I get it, nik. Excellent thoughts here.


hugs,
buddhakitty.

Thank you BK ❤❤❤