An action of regret

 

I wonder what color my brains will paint the wall
Did anyone hear the shot? Did they hear my body fall?
I hear the foot steps rushing up the staircase.
I hear my moms screams when she sees my brains blown all over the place.
The color is red and chunked with pink sprayed all over the walls.
I wish I had known this was my final curtain call.
I now lay limp and lifeless on floor.
Only hearing my family crying for they’ll hear me laugh never more.
The life i ended once thought to be filled with pain.
I now realize it was all in vein
I closed the door of my life only to paint these walls with blood brains and gun powder
Maybe if I had cried for help this wouldn’t have happened just one or two more times maybe a little louder.
Now the pain I had locked inside
Has been spread to family and friends world wide.
I thought this paintbrush would paint out my demons and sorrows
I used the brush only for a second only to borrow.
But the hole in my head only let them escape.
The coroners here with a blanket with which over my body he will drape.
Now my family has to carry my burden.
I didn’t want to hurt anyone I didn’t want to ruin them.
I see my life was great and filled with joy and laughter and smiles ever bigger.
The depression just wouldn’t let me realize until i had made the mistake, until I had my final thoughts, until I pulled the trigger.
I’m sorry for what I did I’m sorry for what I’ve done.
I didn’t really want to do this but now I’m dead and gone
My demons didn’t die they beat me they won.
And now my demons have only been passed on.


ShaggyWrites