I've been trapped in my head, in this body that's not mine anymore for far too long. I thought I deserved this. I felt guilty that you were trapped inside four walls with bars around it because of me. I thought how selfish was I for aching about my story when there are women who aren't so lucky, at least you stopped eventually right? I've been feeling like I'm a waste, like no matter what I say, no matter what I do, you've defeated me. I can say I'm over this, I can lay here and scream that I forgive you, after all, you're not really to blame. I can tell you and everyone else that I'm strong enough to deal with this, that everyday I don't struggle for air, like I don't see you in flashes like a camera every time I blink. The only thing I can't do is forgive myself for what I let you do..