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Lessons from my Fragmented Soul...

Challenge yourself to step outside  your comfort zone. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes, to fail, to struggle. This is where growth happens.  
 
Never strive for perfection, you’ll wake up one day feeling inadequate, unfulfilled, and crushed by the weight of impossible expectations. Perfectionism is driven by fear and shame; an abuse against oneself. Ultimately, destroying progress, freedom, and creativity.  
 
Instead, strive to be consistent and persistent. You can have all the talent, intentions, resources, and motivation in the world, but without the winds of persistence under your sails, you’ll barely leave the shoreline or reach your destination. In reverse, any talent or resources you may be lacking, can be compensated for through hard work, determination, and persistence. Remain steadfastly focused on your goals and commitments you make, no matter how big or small.  
 
There will always be someone prettier, smarter, or more talented than you... it’s the harsh reality of life. However, It is your responsibility to make the best of the cards you’ve been dealt. Wishing you had been dealt a better hand, does nothing but keep you from discovering the best strategy needed to play the game. Pity never benefited anyone.  
 
But the quickest way to rob yourself of growth and progress is to compare yourself to other people. It leads to insecurity, which is the breeding ground for envy and jealousy. These are toxic insidious poisons to relationships, satisfaction, and success.  
 
Be unique, be weird, be different. Be comfortable in your own skin. March to the beat of your own drum and pave your own path in life. Don’t fit in, stand out!  
 
If everyone else is doing it, chances are you shouldn’t. Remember sheep are easily herded and mislead. Never compromise your morals, character, or integrity for someone else. Stay true to yourself and your convictions.  
 
Be comfortable standing alone, it will be the greatest gift you’ll ever give yourself. Most people never know the peace and freedom found in solitude. Forcing them to rely incessantly on other people for fulfillment in life.  
 
In everything you do, whether its an assignment, job, hobby, or whatever; give it your all. Make sure your actions are something you can be proud of. Do not concern yourself with the opinions of others. What matters most is knowing you did your best.  
 
Don’t ever chase any boy. Ever. Make them work for your attention and prove their worth. Easy girls are a dime a dozen. But if they put in the work, you know they see your worth. If instead they aren’t willing to give you what you deserve or they walk away early, then you see their worth, and you lose nothing.  
 
Know when to walk away from people, situations, and even the thoughts in your head. Most importantly, know when to walk away from toxic, unfulfilling relationships. You are not obligated to tolerate mistreatment or abuse. Ever. Period. People treat you how you allow them to treat you. Set boundaries and stay true to them. When someone crosses them, don’t give them a second chance to do it again.  
 
Remember words have power, and therefore carry deep responsibility. Be mindful of the words you use... Words can cut deep, leaving wounds that last decades. And words can empower and be impactful, even when seeming insignificant to you. Once spoken, you can’t ever take them back. So have conviction when you speak. It’s better to remain silent than to be ingenuine, dishonest, insincere, or respond out of hurt or anger. “Dicere Verum”, is Latin for, speak truth. Let no words escape your mouth that you are reluctant to account for. Make it your life motto.  
 
Fight for what you believe in. I don’t care what it is. If it matters to you, stand up for it and don’t waver.  
 
Stand up for those who struggle to stand up for themselves. Don’t settle for complacency. Fight against injustice. If something doesn’t sit right with you, speak up! Be an example, empower others, be an agent of change. Standing tall against discrimination, bullying, and violence.  
 
Remember beauty that is only skin deep, is superficial and fleeting. But beauty that reaches down to the depths of your soul, is rare and it’s treasured. Very few people have it, and it’s like a spark that radiates life. It may take a while for boys and other people to appreciate that, but I promise, in time, they will.  If anything you encounter doesn’t resonate with the beauty in your soul... let it go. And run from anything that aims to dim the light that shines through you.  
 
And my sweet girl, with that giant heart of gold..don’t ever let anyone hinder you from loving  with everything you have. Or feeling deeply, the pains of others.  
 
Continue to be the leader of the misfit toys. This beautifully endearing quality you have to make everyone feel welcomed and accepted is a gift to the world. We need more of it, train the others!  
 
Being kind and generous will always put you at greater risk of being taken advantage of or exploited. Choose to be trusting anyway while  remaining cautious and vigilant, It will always serve you better than being distrustful, selfish, and greedy. It also helps you sleep better at night. Awarding you a clear conscience and good karma.  
 
Don’t be afraid of things you can’t control. There will be loss, hurt, pain, challenges, heartbreak, broken trust, devastations, and chaos that you will inevitably face. But no amount of worrying will ever prevent them from happening. Don’t be so scared of what might go wrong, that you’re too scared to live.  Life is short, tomorrow is not promised. Live in the moment, while always believing in and working towards the future.  
 
Find what you’re passionate about and feverishly pursue it. Get lost in it...In studying it, practicing it, growing in it....perfecting your craft.  
 
When the world gets heavy, and you feel overwhelmed... create. Transform the pain, the hurt, whatever is hindering you by turning it into art. Channeling it  into something outside yourself,  allows you to manipulate, control, and master your emotions. That’s where healing is found and self discovery flourishes. Whatever you create, can be  used to inspire. That’s where you help others find themselves and give back to the world.  
 
Know that these pieces of advice,  were lessons I had to learn the hard way. But true wisdom comes from learning from the mistakes of others. My hope is that I can shield you from some pain in this world...
 
But I want you to fearlessly and fiercely go into that big world and make your own mistakes, gain your own wisdom, and live through your own hard lessons in life.  
 
And as you come through this phase of your life where it’s time to spread your wings and fly on your own for a bit, just know you are never on this journey alone. Even if I am not physically present, I will always be a phone call away.  
 
Know that no matter who you become, what paths you take, what mistakes you make, you will always be accepted and loved for exactly who you are. You will always be welcomed back with loving arms. I love you, nothing can ever change that.  
 
You’re going to change the world, one person’s life at a time. You’ve changed mine. You’re changing yours...Everyone is a better person for having known you.  
 
There’s is so much power within you...You’ve only scratched the surface...
Written by Lazy_Dead (.Julia.)
Published | Edited 31st Jul 2020
Author's Note
Written for the middle school graduate in my life...
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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