Surroundings of a child in poverty

Growing up as a kid,
I grew to be abused.
searching for answers,
all questions were then elluded.

unable lace my shoes,
I was muzzled,
stuck mumbling my emotions,
sadness stand silent,
syllables exit in whispers,
I act out with temper
since my whimpers are muted.

Death became a childhood dream,
attacks are unseen, compassion is absent, entrapped in this madness, dads crafty he’s passive, Savy at masking attacks. sadly lost like addicts that pass.

grappling with facts, against me are the odds, solicit anybody for help, assistance is distant, metro that I’m from, snitches butt in business/so face down can’t witness/ quickly proceeding passed cries, blind to all the lies, only if they peered maybe notice where truth lies.boy does truth hide,

presumably they assumed, I just needed a prayer,
consumed by the fact, they can’t see behind the back, of the door when it slams shut.
witnesses eyes wide, witness visions of discernment and shrewd expressions.
because I’m identical to the stereotypes, trouble bombarded me, just another youth in poverty.

infested by gangs, pestered, running away from being molested,
I have nothing to gain so I stay, even though it pains too much.
prayers left ignored, praying for an angels touch. Plea's for escaping deafened by Satan,
I must be a cat with nine lives, I've already died like six times, before even seeing seven.
running out of breath, desperate to be heard, eyes flooded, pouring down with all hope.

kicked to the left, left to fend for his own,
clothes covered in dust, tattered and torn,
doesn’t matter to none, no one to look his direction and morn,
so he picks himself up, clothes covered in dust,
filled with hatred and scorn, he doesn’t matter to none, blindly he directs himself into misdirection, judgment is off, thoughts need recollecting,
to steer into the right directions, yield all recollections of the past, before you know it the present has passed, staring into the eyes of the future

recollecting why he’s where he has arrived,
suddenly hit with epiphany,realizes his life’s mistakes, from choices he made,but doesn’t point blame.

three hundred and sixty five days, one hundred and sixty eight hours he fights, struggles to stay afloat. body in pain breathing heavy sweating,
will’s too strong refusing to quit treading.
waves so rough slowly eroding away the souls, already been left back.

ones who once wore his shoes were tired of fighting, so they banded together to fight back.
now labeled a gang, once victims of the past,
stood to fight alone, backbones have been snatched, stand together they fear none, in numbers they got back,

referred to as useless, a nuisance, warn parents this group is, the same age as your kids in school,
they using school as their newest recruitment.
truth is suburban kids, look in join in this new trend.
sagging baggy clothes, listen to rap music, following all the cool kids.

one day the news hit. white kid is cruising with thugs, abusing drugs,
began to scream, scared he’s about to lose it,
when he heard what he thought was in the music, until he looked down noticed all the blood he was losing.
conscience replaying, consciousness fades,

converses with god, pleading to save him,
alarm sounds out the door is adjacent,
ran off so fast rubber stuck to the pavement.
lungs struggle for air, as he wonders if the next breath will be his last,
afraid to relax, worried he won’t wake, heart beats weak, objects appearing in doubles, spinning thoughts of dying appear through light, as hes starting to faint.

perhaps this is a passing of the torch, or changing of the times.
violent crimes spike, as murder rates rise.
rip to the ones who died, and to the ones living, as poverty is on the rise.
cries silent and forgotten, thrown into low income housing and projects ignorant to what they ignore, leaving no help for the poor, so of course we’re burning buildings and stores. tired being overshadowed and ignored.

if you want this conflict to seize, must take a second to stop, and understand pain, see in hearts of those who’s reality is where it starts.