Despite It

When did I get so jaded and bitter?
I donít remember. Which particular
Incident tipped the feather?
Was it the first time I lost my voice?
Couldnít say no to innocence lost.
Just 4 years, experienced on earth,
Violating hands, that gave me no choice.
No haven. I was still a happy child. Despite it.

Was it the second? No stranger danger..
Loved ones who calculate, to violate, the manger.
How can a six year old be sexualised?
Yet the perpetrator not be demonised?
No haven. I still was, a happy child. Despite it.

Was it the third? A decade on earth,
Up next to confirm, my only worth.
Secrets they forced till my body hurt
No amount of scouring would wash away the dirt
My no and my stop, a voice never heard.
No haven. Was I still a happy child, Despite it?

Was it the forth? A Mother now.
Building a life of which she was proud,
Biting back demons, seeing them cowed;
Working with vulnerable, no damaged child.
Till he slipped in her drink, took her control
her dignity, her safety, her right to say no!
No haven. A happy child, was I still? Despite it?

Was it the fifth? Promise to love and protect.
Never saw it coming and didnít expect
Violating violence, hurting in depths.
Smirking, telling me, what did you expect?
Just because they didnít like an uninvited text.
No haven. Happy? A Child I was still. Despite it.

Many more times, I donít need to mention.
Just want to understand my own intention?
Donít want to be so jaded and bitter.
Though itís my story, Iím not a quitter.
So dig dirt deep, light the shadows inside me.
No haven? I still be a happy child. Despite it.
Written by Brokenpoet2020
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 3 reading list entries 0
comments 4 reads 361
Commenting Preference: 
The author encourages honest critique.

Latest Forum Discussions
Today 3:38pm by da_poetic-edifier
Today 1:08pm by LunaGreyhawk
Today 1:05pm by LunaGreyhawk
Today 12:51pm by nutbuster
Today 10:12am by Northern_Soul
Today 5:32am by Daevileyes