One night in a bar

The instrumental blows  
Slow saxophone    
Accompanying my mood    
I tip the man with dip and shake    
    
Smoke and it's pillaring      
High and blue    
Like writhing tendrils    
Of the Medusa      
And her memories of when    
She was a beauty queen      
     
A thought occurs    
by tossed delivery    
However heavy my scrupulous resolve    
This kind of heaven is thick    
With indiscretion      
     
So one for my baby    
And one more for the road    
     
My bend of elbow      
Breeches slow slur    
My tongue takes on heaviness    
Ripe without pretense      
Formulation of rationale      
Dissolves    
     
My hands sticky      
With traces of me    
     
And my eye    
covers itself with hanging hood    
My view now comfortably obscured    
I am everything      
And I am nothing    
     
But hold on to this babygirl    
     
I am everything      
When not nothing    
     
The secrets of my skin    
Still feel beyond the numbing      
Goosefleshed and cold with fear    
Of the wide awake in darkness    
     
I am so afraid of the dark    
I have been made to exist    
under this neon light    
   
Somewhere inside it feels    
This heaven is not right    
My bliss is a traitor    
He might hang for these crimes    
   
And my soul    
She hurts    
My bridge is under fire    
The water boils    
   
And still I dip my toes    
   
Beyond the carnage and heat    
Still the sax man blows    
And lulls me    
But how I love this music    
I sink and I listen  
   
Until all around me shoosh  
Shoosh  
And ease into breathe  
Way to close for comfort  
So close to death
 
I raise my glass to my new companion
She stares with eyes
Of truth and beauty
their light I have never seen
nor hoped to
 
And still they shake me to my bones  
 
So much so and that ever after
The darkness has befriended me
And built me a home  
And kept my peace