deepundergroundpoetry.com
The Focus
They broke over hearing the news
poured paper thin as a ghastly headline
Jacks glance spotted it at once between the ink
he hugged his family, slid the curtain, observant of the rot outdoors
Lucy waved frantically from her window
her mirror image and Listerine losing appeal
she was unsure if he ever paid attention, eyebrows like skylines
images of his posture were shadowed in compromised serenity
Jack was hostage watching the ominous smoke rise above his family
thumps heard in the distance trampled like elephants
one could feel the foot vibrate , distant horizons drab and ever pale
black smoke sailed out there along with fleeing residents
one jumped then two, leaping to freedom bound and gagged at once
their quick motions were noticed as Jack flinched
another black mailbox truck another couple disappears
Lucy whimpers standing still in the window, pining
her smile wasn't feigned admiring that jawline from forty feet away
his eye was all she needed, leaning with just the right stance
pictures of romance, like in her novels played music in her head
light songs of the dead drive by below with a police stamp and Nissan logo
Lucy looked down for just a second, admiring the black van for nail polish
Jack caught glimpse of her snow-white shoulders, sudden memories of last years Winter
both making eye contact, sparks shot across the distance
That black & tan building around the block crumbles in a plume of smoke
Jack smiled spellbound by Lucy's eyes, how they sparkle looking at him
She pressed her breasts against the window laughing, jack turned beet red
looking behind him to ensure no one else was catching these sights
their eyes again transfixed he could make out blue even from that distance
these high school sweethearts, having met up again last yr.
causing stir that afternoon, Darance park, lost in lip-lock for most
badly they wanted to be with one another, sharing dream
touch, skin roped in trust, sweat shared, lust & loves decree
yet again another shell explodes in distance, bombs for cages
their eyes crying with five digits pressed on pane
plaster cracking, sign of times as once more again, sirens wail
Lucy had a gas mask delivered, her Jack nearer, she smiles
his hand waves though Jack would rather linger, he feels guilty
the family distant, yet he must give his presence
interaction for his kids, mother and dog, they hold out
more news of warnings blare from t.v.'s anchorman-distress
Hell has come along with riot guards, flak-jacket fellows, batons that shock
their gas-mask smiles of absolution await this populace
anyone outside carted away, one down, two down, how many more
cracks of all this once upon time life, graduating in shell-shock
Lucy wanders away, thinking of pulling it off this Saturday
heee, she remembered the day of the week tee-hee
proud now, she pulls out her only dress left, smelling its fragrance.
so much everyone lost, mostly one another, cloaked in every way to hold on
Air patrols, the swarm of helicopters proceeded by drones flit by
one world blowing up, set afire by every nation, chokes
grasping at the fragment left, hoping it is enough for more
common folk wail as the doomsday clock moved one minute closer
holding on now with both hands at the wheel, billionaires direct traffic
his kids mute staring blankly, flashing images, dying citizens
the mother glances misty-eyed and smiles, do you need anything honey
with his gracious reply his head side to side, O his mothers love
dote he knows, hearing a neighbors door bust in suddenly
screams of protest, officers walkies screech and scramble
shouts of harbor, accusation tied violence, wail fair citizen
but Jack remembers this neighbor, sharing laughter...now no longer
the shot only once means perfection for these gorillas
his strength wanes sulking to kitchen, the tears pour in stifled silence
Lucy sings from her shower, eyes alive and spirit shining
now the rumble of a five point five stops the officers conversation
the disturbance stops all life for a minute, but mostly at main impact downtown
the sun is going down behind the slate obscured sky
black smoke patchwork crops up from more random buildings
gains and possibilities for acreage on a dying planet
how many bellies still have fire, remain to be seen, must be more he sobs
poured paper thin as a ghastly headline
Jacks glance spotted it at once between the ink
he hugged his family, slid the curtain, observant of the rot outdoors
Lucy waved frantically from her window
her mirror image and Listerine losing appeal
she was unsure if he ever paid attention, eyebrows like skylines
images of his posture were shadowed in compromised serenity
Jack was hostage watching the ominous smoke rise above his family
thumps heard in the distance trampled like elephants
one could feel the foot vibrate , distant horizons drab and ever pale
black smoke sailed out there along with fleeing residents
one jumped then two, leaping to freedom bound and gagged at once
their quick motions were noticed as Jack flinched
another black mailbox truck another couple disappears
Lucy whimpers standing still in the window, pining
her smile wasn't feigned admiring that jawline from forty feet away
his eye was all she needed, leaning with just the right stance
pictures of romance, like in her novels played music in her head
light songs of the dead drive by below with a police stamp and Nissan logo
Lucy looked down for just a second, admiring the black van for nail polish
Jack caught glimpse of her snow-white shoulders, sudden memories of last years Winter
both making eye contact, sparks shot across the distance
That black & tan building around the block crumbles in a plume of smoke
Jack smiled spellbound by Lucy's eyes, how they sparkle looking at him
She pressed her breasts against the window laughing, jack turned beet red
looking behind him to ensure no one else was catching these sights
their eyes again transfixed he could make out blue even from that distance
these high school sweethearts, having met up again last yr.
causing stir that afternoon, Darance park, lost in lip-lock for most
badly they wanted to be with one another, sharing dream
touch, skin roped in trust, sweat shared, lust & loves decree
yet again another shell explodes in distance, bombs for cages
their eyes crying with five digits pressed on pane
plaster cracking, sign of times as once more again, sirens wail
Lucy had a gas mask delivered, her Jack nearer, she smiles
his hand waves though Jack would rather linger, he feels guilty
the family distant, yet he must give his presence
interaction for his kids, mother and dog, they hold out
more news of warnings blare from t.v.'s anchorman-distress
Hell has come along with riot guards, flak-jacket fellows, batons that shock
their gas-mask smiles of absolution await this populace
anyone outside carted away, one down, two down, how many more
cracks of all this once upon time life, graduating in shell-shock
Lucy wanders away, thinking of pulling it off this Saturday
heee, she remembered the day of the week tee-hee
proud now, she pulls out her only dress left, smelling its fragrance.
so much everyone lost, mostly one another, cloaked in every way to hold on
Air patrols, the swarm of helicopters proceeded by drones flit by
one world blowing up, set afire by every nation, chokes
grasping at the fragment left, hoping it is enough for more
common folk wail as the doomsday clock moved one minute closer
holding on now with both hands at the wheel, billionaires direct traffic
his kids mute staring blankly, flashing images, dying citizens
the mother glances misty-eyed and smiles, do you need anything honey
with his gracious reply his head side to side, O his mothers love
dote he knows, hearing a neighbors door bust in suddenly
screams of protest, officers walkies screech and scramble
shouts of harbor, accusation tied violence, wail fair citizen
but Jack remembers this neighbor, sharing laughter...now no longer
the shot only once means perfection for these gorillas
his strength wanes sulking to kitchen, the tears pour in stifled silence
Lucy sings from her shower, eyes alive and spirit shining
now the rumble of a five point five stops the officers conversation
the disturbance stops all life for a minute, but mostly at main impact downtown
the sun is going down behind the slate obscured sky
black smoke patchwork crops up from more random buildings
gains and possibilities for acreage on a dying planet
how many bellies still have fire, remain to be seen, must be more he sobs
Published 20th Apr 2020
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 19
reading list entries 7
comments 32
reads 675
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
20th Apr 2020 5:28pm
This is a spellbinding story. I saw the action: chaotic. Its like a swift montage depicting war or a suppression of sorts and a family caught within. It reminds me of Stephen King's book Regulators.Good read, Soul.
20th Apr 2020 6:07pm
Thank You Grace, I had hoped it would convey ok in this sense.
It was automatic Write and those for me just tend to be the way for me to loosen up most of the time, often losing point.
Appreciate You always!!!
It was automatic Write and those for me just tend to be the way for me to loosen up most of the time, often losing point.
Appreciate You always!!!
20th Apr 2020 5:52pm
Ohhhh, just ohhh....these images to my throat and sting my eyes
Incendiary
💛
Incendiary
💛
20th Apr 2020 6:10pm
Thank You for swinging by Hellcat!!!
Your expressions and RL-I am Honoured-Thank You!!!
You are quite adept with such type tales so it means much You approve.
This was simply stretch exercise, but was trying to be coherent with it, I am so happy it conveyed well enough.
Your expressions and RL-I am Honoured-Thank You!!!
You are quite adept with such type tales so it means much You approve.
This was simply stretch exercise, but was trying to be coherent with it, I am so happy it conveyed well enough.
20th Apr 2020 6:50pm
20th Apr 2020 9:25pm
20th Apr 2020 7:51pm
20th Apr 2020 9:26pm
20th Apr 2020 8:47pm
My Special Friend.....
The emotions--directly expressed, and implied between the lines--are intense with this one....and are both sad and bittersweet, with characters realistic and believable! This reads like a Sy-Fi piece... enfolding on another planet... in some futuristic society! Yet the entire piece has elements--events...the setting--that could very easily become our own world , one day! And while this piece definitely stands alone, as a remarkable short story, with its own, outstanding creative merits, it also reads as a prologue--perhaps--or, even the First chapter in a continued novella/saga! It has caused me to want to read more...and more!
Intriguing Ink!!! A veRRy Well Done to You! <3
The emotions--directly expressed, and implied between the lines--are intense with this one....and are both sad and bittersweet, with characters realistic and believable! This reads like a Sy-Fi piece... enfolding on another planet... in some futuristic society! Yet the entire piece has elements--events...the setting--that could very easily become our own world , one day! And while this piece definitely stands alone, as a remarkable short story, with its own, outstanding creative merits, it also reads as a prologue--perhaps--or, even the First chapter in a continued novella/saga! It has caused me to want to read more...and more!
Intriguing Ink!!! A veRRy Well Done to You! <3
20th Apr 2020 9:29pm
Awwww why Thank You DE!!!
I appreciate Your delve into this bleak bit of Write...
This is probably about as close a Covid Write as You'll see from me.
No continuing tale here, it's out of my system, something different now for I will surely be depressed lol.
I appreciate Your delve into this bleak bit of Write...
This is probably about as close a Covid Write as You'll see from me.
No continuing tale here, it's out of my system, something different now for I will surely be depressed lol.
Anonymous
20th Apr 2020 9:39pm
Intense & impacting. Absorbing. Has a filmic (is that a word? lol) quality. Rob
20th Apr 2020 9:48pm
It's a word now Rob!!! :D
Man I appreciate the read, RL and visit Good Sir-Thank You as well for such a kind compliment!!!
Man I appreciate the read, RL and visit Good Sir-Thank You as well for such a kind compliment!!!
Anonymous
20th Apr 2020 9:51pm
that curtain-lace, peaked through, bungled murder 'scape, micro and macrocosm of a view of..is this now!...?
contrast turned up loud..the belly of context murdered and set on fire.
love in the ash.
beautiful...a real fucking treat tonight.
contrast turned up loud..the belly of context murdered and set on fire.
love in the ash.
beautiful...a real fucking treat tonight.
20th Apr 2020 9:56pm
21st Apr 2020 1:36am
It was like watching a movie in slow motion, like feeling every single beat, echo and vibration.
I like how you built the story, slow, with glimpse of background story and certainly the haunting images mirroring what is going on right now.
Time to write that book mister :)
I like how you built the story, slow, with glimpse of background story and certainly the haunting images mirroring what is going on right now.
Time to write that book mister :)
21st Apr 2020 12:40pm
I owe You a visit and I'm fkn late, I'm sorry...the way of the lately.
I appreciate You saying
"It was like watching a movie in slow motion, like feeling every single beat, echo and vibration."
That was the effect I was aiming for!!!
It definitely had the movie aspect whilst scribbling it.
I started a few short stories, a couple near finished and a few only around halfway...You know me...I look at it later and hate it.
If I don't post instantly after writing...it's lost for good.
Thank You so much!!!
I appreciate You saying
"It was like watching a movie in slow motion, like feeling every single beat, echo and vibration."
That was the effect I was aiming for!!!
It definitely had the movie aspect whilst scribbling it.
I started a few short stories, a couple near finished and a few only around halfway...You know me...I look at it later and hate it.
If I don't post instantly after writing...it's lost for good.
Thank You so much!!!
22nd Apr 2020 6:27am
Beautiful writing, Gabriel. I haven't been in these parts for a while but I'm heartened to see you're still brandishing the tools of a wordsmith exceedingly well !
22nd Apr 2020 11:50am
Tony!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I've missed You Brother!!!!
I hope You are safe and well My Friend!!!
What a surprise, thanks for swinging by my pad Good Sir, things of the bleak I have to jot down once and a while.
Appreciate Your support and lookin' out!!!!
Hope You start to wander back regular, need You about Hellion
Hope You've been playing!!!
I've missed You Brother!!!!
I hope You are safe and well My Friend!!!
What a surprise, thanks for swinging by my pad Good Sir, things of the bleak I have to jot down once and a while.
Appreciate Your support and lookin' out!!!!
Hope You start to wander back regular, need You about Hellion
Hope You've been playing!!!
23rd Apr 2020 3:54am
how in the hell did I not catch this right away! brilliant! love to you <3
23rd Apr 2020 11:22am
I'm so glad You are one to have read this, I feel You to be one who would better take to it's style or delivery...
I really Appreciate the kindness and visit ML
Probably going to be the closest to a Covid Write You'll see from me, I won't can't focus on such dismal shit, it is too overloaded and I won't let myself fall prey to it's depression by wallowing in it more than we are forced to be physically in it.
Hugs to You (Even virtual) they are there!!!
I really Appreciate the kindness and visit ML
Probably going to be the closest to a Covid Write You'll see from me, I won't can't focus on such dismal shit, it is too overloaded and I won't let myself fall prey to it's depression by wallowing in it more than we are forced to be physically in it.
Hugs to You (Even virtual) they are there!!!
23rd Apr 2020 11:35pm
I would totally hug you! This was wow. Love this and you!
Keep up the awesome drops! <3
Keep up the awesome drops! <3
23rd Apr 2020 9:50pm
The back and forth, pendulum perspective, between the two, gives the story a rather storyboard and gripping progression, the voice holds a kind of cognizant, prescient foreboding darkness that is gripping, carrying you to the end. The details are vivid and starkly lurid. Its a fantastic write.
24th Apr 2020 2:00pm
Really happy to see Your thoughts here Daniel, means a lot to me Brother-Thank You!!!
You know my flip flops between walking Dark N Light...
I love to delve them both and it isn't often I get to play in the cold harsh of a world like this.
Most of these styles stay on my pads of paper for the "maybe" sometimes.
I wanted to flesh it out a tad more, a few avenues I had floating in my mind, but I despise over-tinkering things...long ramblings as to why I have such views of my Writing ways...but essentially I hit the point of impatience and said fuk it-post.
I hope You are doing well My Friend, I'm not spitting out all I wanted to say to You here, apologies...But Thank You again-You Words always mean much to me Good Sir!!!
You know my flip flops between walking Dark N Light...
I love to delve them both and it isn't often I get to play in the cold harsh of a world like this.
Most of these styles stay on my pads of paper for the "maybe" sometimes.
I wanted to flesh it out a tad more, a few avenues I had floating in my mind, but I despise over-tinkering things...long ramblings as to why I have such views of my Writing ways...but essentially I hit the point of impatience and said fuk it-post.
I hope You are doing well My Friend, I'm not spitting out all I wanted to say to You here, apologies...But Thank You again-You Words always mean much to me Good Sir!!!
24th Apr 2020 4:50pm
I like to juxtapose between dark and light vibrations too, brother. I think the most important thing is to write honestly, which requires courage.
It's always an honor and a privilege to read you and be your friend.
It's always an honor and a privilege to read you and be your friend.
Anonymous
24th Apr 2020 6:42pm
This flows so naturally and captures so many emotions and aspects of life. The format is brilliant.
24th Apr 2020 7:03pm
Means much to me to see You here-Thank You for reading my scribbles.
Emotion for me tends to be my core "grab at" for most things..if I can pick and center upon a one...I tend to write better...also feeling better within myself during/after (whether its exclusion of negativity or flowery and soft style)
Emotion for me tends to be my core "grab at" for most things..if I can pick and center upon a one...I tend to write better...also feeling better within myself during/after (whether its exclusion of negativity or flowery and soft style)
Anonymous
- Edited 24th Apr 2020 7:32pm
24th Apr 2020 7:13pm
Sadly I have not had much time to read lately but I definitely look forward to reading more. Yesterday I was a complete wreck so reading helps calm me down today. Thank you for providing amazing material for me.
Anonymous
25th Apr 2020 10:04pm
This is one of the more interesting pieces I’ve read today. I had to read it a few times through to genuinely appreciate the nuances in it, and seemed to get a slightly different angle every time.
I’m such a sucker for a perfect ending, and I think that’s pretty evident here.
Warm. That’s the word I’m looking for.
-M
I’m such a sucker for a perfect ending, and I think that’s pretty evident here.
Warm. That’s the word I’m looking for.
-M
25th Apr 2020 10:12pm
Appreciate You reading this Hellion!!!
I am glad the warmth stands out...No matter the bleak I will forever be such an optimistic person about things.
Some lines were a tad too squirrelly but it was a instant write...so screw it...no edits
I am glad the warmth stands out...No matter the bleak I will forever be such an optimistic person about things.
Some lines were a tad too squirrelly but it was a instant write...so screw it...no edits
26th Apr 2020 7:01am
3rd May 2020 12:55pm
Tremendous potential here. The pace of it was absolutely captivating and the cut scenes built the story in a way that captured the imagination.
3rd May 2020 9:23pm
Appreciate You stopping by Ani and thank You for the kind compliment.
Yeah not normally my bag of ramblings, but was in the mood for something different that day.
Yeah not normally my bag of ramblings, but was in the mood for something different that day.
