Searching for the exit

It was your last lucid activity.
Your agitated night-wandering,
your perplexity growing to anger,
to the terror of a lost child.
It seemed so unfair,
undignified
that we could trick your once-keen scholar’s mind
by hiding doors with a curtain
or a picturesque coat of paint.

Still you searched,
you fretted,
you even fought
with all your Navy Frogman instincts
And fearsome as that was, I grinned with pride,
even as I admitted we had to let them take your fight away.

And now I’m glad, Dad,
that you left before this.
We never could have explained it –
how we’re all cooped up now,
searching for the exit
trying to escape the horror
while holding fast
to the ones we love most.

I’m glad we were allowed to be with you
…there are so many who can’t now…
to listen to your last breaths
and tell you over and over it was ok to go.
We waited while you searched…
I’m glad you finally found your exit.