Draft love pt 1 of a lifetime

I’m not putting my heart another place  
it  
doesn’t
 
belong
 
With you
 
When I loved you  
Everyday was
A Lovely Day
I found myself footing the  
                            Bill  
While this love still Withers  
Faster than the roses  
In the heat of  
Our Convenient Sex
I used the word EX more times
Than I said I loved the way  
You used to have me on all fours
Against the project wall in the kitchen Of our Queens apartment
All of the bullshit arguments I was starting  
Both of us shouting which one cheating  
Cell phone ringing
U used be the one I was creeping with in the basement of my mama and pops crib
Hands on each other violently  
On who’s buying the baby a crib
The first one!
 
The fourth one
You had both hands wrapped around my neck against the kitchen sink
Blood dripping  
Cops interviewing  
No pictures please
I’m not pursuing pressing charges
That was last argument  
My heart was starving for healing
Al green said let’s stay together  
But me and pain tired of facing cold weather  
You frigid  like New York winters
Just one more draft beer  
And you come stumbling  
And mumbling I need you
I love you
If I could draft love and rewrite the script  
I’d still write the chain of events without the heartbreak because my four kids are not a mistake  
So pour me one more so I can drown out the pain of these Physical and mental  bruises  
In this 151