In Chains

I die
Just... a little more. with each tempered thought
Knowing you don't mourn for anything we've lost
There must be someone knows that feeling...
 
It's the one that catches in your throat and explodes into your chest
Replaces Love with an empty void cuz the Queen of Hearts was not impressed
 
But  
I accepted her blind fury. Ravaged yet, sublime
A masochistic wish for stars whose lights will never shine
So agitated with confusion, I fought to find a way
To deal with staying here. just suspended in a way
Just hanging on in the dark. That's how I was gonna live
Keeping my mouth quiet and continuing to give
 
So now?
I'm hanging from a string that's swinging from a pendulum
There are voices in dark now and I don't know where they're comin from
But they're telling me,  "Just... let... go... the ground is not that far
You're just hanging from the ceiling, Baby. Not a shooting star"
And my head is telling me to do it  
That I can't spare the shame  
Of jumping back into the fire
Just to try to catch its flames
 
But in my heart I know  
All I have is to hold on  
The moment I let go, that's it
All of it is gone
So the distance between my lips to yours
And my hands letting go
Had my knuckles deadlocked  
To reap what I thought I had sewn
 
I became complacent in my misery and called it Strength til I could feel
It was Defeat that kept me humble cuz Fairy Tales ain't real
 
But I got eyes so open wide now that I'm stretching out the sockets
Took back the heart the Queen cut out. Now it's hanging from my pocket
 
Perhaps, another will accept what was offered in the past
I guess it's true what they say, about another man's trash
I thought I had been valued as a treasure and put way up on High
It wasn't darkness I was living in, my stupidity made me blind
 
I feel like I know what it's like to have seen
Heaven
And my entry been denied
Then had to seek a higher power through a fallen angel's eyes
 
I contemplated sacrificing every. single. bit. of pride.  
But no prey alive would sit there wounded at the hungry Grizzly's side
You see, I'm not your Frankenstein and I'm not your seething whore
I did not create your madness nor become what your abhore  
But I created my own shackles  
Worn with pride. Until they cut and made me sore  
Turns out you can't lock yourself to something that was
Never truly yours
 
But I walk away triumphant that I can face and swallow my own wrongs
I pulled the heart out of my pocket and put it back where it belongs
I gave up the key with the best of me
I thought for my own sake
But the chains were mine with which to bind
Just as they were mine to break