deepundergroundpoetry.com
THE EARTH CONTAINS BOTH.
THE EARTH CONTAINS BOTH.
The earth is where the two are found at large,
the soul of goodness and the one of vice.
We are completely with the source of love,
but you and l, l think, hate what is bad.
A man in his right mind loves what is chaste,
and tries to get immersed in what is pure.
No one will go to sewage to swim there,
but all would love to rub themselves with balm.
I seek for perfume that l love to smell.
It takes me up to such a higher state.
This perfume and this balm are in the world,
but with them is the dirt that we avoid.
BY JOSEPH ZENIEH
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
____________________________________
The earth is where the two are found at large,
the soul of goodness and the one of vice.
We are completely with the source of love,
but you and l, l think, hate what is bad.
A man in his right mind loves what is chaste,
and tries to get immersed in what is pure.
No one will go to sewage to swim there,
but all would love to rub themselves with balm.
I seek for perfume that l love to smell.
It takes me up to such a higher state.
This perfume and this balm are in the world,
but with them is the dirt that we avoid.
BY JOSEPH ZENIEH
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
____________________________________
Published 30th Mar 2020
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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30th Mar 2020 6:18pm
Who would have known
except you told it us
the world’s a place
where one encounters dirt
but also where
we can with cleanliness
be girt.
except you told it us
the world’s a place
where one encounters dirt
but also where
we can with cleanliness
be girt.
30th Mar 2020 6:42pm
Who would have known/ except you told us...
Is this good English, Baldwin? Can you explain it please? And is your poem a question without a question mark or what?
Is this good English, Baldwin? Can you explain it please? And is your poem a question without a question mark or what?
I did not write "Who would have known/ except you told us...". I wrote "Who would have known except you told IT us". And yes, it is good English. The elipsis in the line is perfectly acceptable.
And no, it is not a question. It's a rhetorical remark.
Why do you keep writing these all tell no show, pompous pieces about the ontology of the world? ?
And no, it is not a question. It's a rhetorical remark.
Why do you keep writing these all tell no show, pompous pieces about the ontology of the world? ?
30th Mar 2020 7:34pm
Sorry, l forgot the IT. ......except you told it us...... Is that correct? It is worse if it is without IT. Can you please write it without ellipsis, l mean fully. Ellipsis with double L, by the way.
I'll write the line without ellipsis when you stop presenting yourself in "all tell, no show" pieces as being more knowledgable than anyone on the way the world is set up, how blind "men" are to the truth, what really brings happiness to mankind, and what the ultimate goal of human life is.
I asked you once to show that you were actually capable of writing something other than the pompous and paternalistic, overly didactic and melodramatic pieces that you post here; something about the joys or the harrowings of love that uses the devices of poetry other than rhythm and rhyme -- i.e., metaphor and simile, concrete appeals to the senses, sonics, and sparkling, grammatically sound invocatory language -- to be truly evocative and that would bring a reader inside the experience of being in love.
I'm still waiting to see if you have the talent to do so.
I asked you once to show that you were actually capable of writing something other than the pompous and paternalistic, overly didactic and melodramatic pieces that you post here; something about the joys or the harrowings of love that uses the devices of poetry other than rhythm and rhyme -- i.e., metaphor and simile, concrete appeals to the senses, sonics, and sparkling, grammatically sound invocatory language -- to be truly evocative and that would bring a reader inside the experience of being in love.
I'm still waiting to see if you have the talent to do so.
One of these days
you might admit
the way you write
just isn’t fit
for bringing wonder
to the world;
admit that in your strange
insistence that
a writing must be jacketed
within a line trussed up
(not always well)
in stilted measurements,
but need not be concerned
with lyrical felicity
with metaphor and simile,
or any of the elements
that are the bare necessities
if one is ever to produce
some tantalizing verse
is wrong
and come to know
your writings always lack
the slightest power
or any bright ability
to make a reader see
what’s glorious and true
with eyes closed shut
which really is,
as Pastan notes, the goal
of poetry.
But knowing you
and how you are immersed
within your plainly falsifiable belief
that writing poorly is
a thing impossible
for you to do,
that you and you alone
are privy to, have grasped, “God’s truth”
and have an unsurpassed command
of English, too,
within your finger-tips,
I doubt I’ll ever hear
admission such as these
upon your lips.
you might admit
the way you write
just isn’t fit
for bringing wonder
to the world;
admit that in your strange
insistence that
a writing must be jacketed
within a line trussed up
(not always well)
in stilted measurements,
but need not be concerned
with lyrical felicity
with metaphor and simile,
or any of the elements
that are the bare necessities
if one is ever to produce
some tantalizing verse
is wrong
and come to know
your writings always lack
the slightest power
or any bright ability
to make a reader see
what’s glorious and true
with eyes closed shut
which really is,
as Pastan notes, the goal
of poetry.
But knowing you
and how you are immersed
within your plainly falsifiable belief
that writing poorly is
a thing impossible
for you to do,
that you and you alone
are privy to, have grasped, “God’s truth”
and have an unsurpassed command
of English, too,
within your finger-tips,
I doubt I’ll ever hear
admission such as these
upon your lips.
30th Mar 2020 8:50pm
Isn't that a dodge. I am still waiting to see your elliptical structure written fully and correctly.
30th Mar 2020 9:20pm
What's an "elliptical structure"? And how would such a structure be written correctly?
And my reply is not a dodge. I did not say I wouldn't show you what I ellided. I followed your example of making your willingness to answer questions I asked of you conditional.
And if I am wrong to do so, then so were you in all the times you did it and will be wrong to do so any time in the future that you might do it again.
BTW, didn't you once try to tell me (incorrectly as it turned out) what "emission" is. Given this, why should I have to show you what it is?
And my reply is not a dodge. I did not say I wouldn't show you what I ellided. I followed your example of making your willingness to answer questions I asked of you conditional.
And if I am wrong to do so, then so were you in all the times you did it and will be wrong to do so any time in the future that you might do it again.
BTW, didn't you once try to tell me (incorrectly as it turned out) what "emission" is. Given this, why should I have to show you what it is?
