Questions part 2

Do you question your choices?
Do you keep thinking about your mistakes?
Do you hear all those condescending voices?
Do you ask yourself why you are alone?

Sometimes life can feel unbearable
Sometimes the path you took was taken at the wrong time
Moments in life may feel extremely terrible
But there is no changing the cards you were given

I think about what I need to do
Do I keep trying even when it seems impossible?
Even when it hurts should I push through?
I don't know who I am meant to become

Your mind is a very special thing
It creates magic but also creates misery
On broken dreams you continue to cling
But you can't escape the cage you created

I fear failure but also success
I fear lies but I also fear the truth
I fear hearing no but I also fear the thought of yes
I fear being alone but even more I fear being known

I am an unsolvable mystery
There is no answer that I can find
I look back at my life history
I live a life of a lot of regret

My greatest enemy has always been me
I lost belief in myself
The light at the end of the tunnel I just can't see
Darkness is around and hope disappears

I wish I had a way to connect with others
I wish I had the courage to be something
I wish I had friends I could consider brothers
But time passed and nothing has changed

I'm not one to ask for any sympathy
I don't want anyone to lie to me
I don't want to have anyone's charity
I just want to find out why I am here

I want to ask questions that can't be given
I want to start my life and find peace
I want to find meaning and become driven
But I don't know why i can't let go

My whole life i have lived in the shadows
I lied and hid from the people that knew me
When the door could be open I instead close
I keep my self from ever truly being whole

I don't know where to begin anew
I got no idea what is next for me
Even in my own created mystery I have no clue
So instead I fall back and stay exactly where I began