Her anger 1 - 5

Her anger 1 (When I was two)

You pee your pants like a baby.
Here's a diaper for you.
Rubbing your nose in the mess.
Bad girl! I shout.
We do not pee our pants in this house!

Her anger 2 (When I was six)

Tied to the chair, it was time to eat.
Knowing I hated fish and canned beets.
She comes over taunts me with words.
The rest of them laugh as shes overheard.
Shove my face in it just like that diaper.
Tied to the chair no way I can fight her.
They all laugh in amusement as I am force fed.
Distant now just feeling the hands on my head.
That night I cleaned my plate vomit and all.
Daydreaming of life while in mental free fall.

Her Anger 3 (When I was ten)

What was that word? Oh that’s right it was fuck.
And for ten goddamned minutes, soap I sucked.
Making sure I bit down hard leaving my identity.
In the mirror, filthy mouth im told asking what I see.
A humiliated person with a bar of soap in their mouth.
Inside thinking wishing I could answer with a shout.
Rinse my mouth if I’m lucky, then it's off to my bed.
Back to daydreaming away from here into my head.

Her Anger 4 (When I was fifteen)

Was the first two times not enough for you to understand?
Another bar of soap, running water and a back hand.
Nearly a half a bar of soap consumed all for her pleasure.
Mental backlash crushing my world with that pressure.
I trained my mind, it was all over when I came too.
Standing shaking, waiting to be told what to do.
The scoul and stern point to my bedroom and off I went.
Back to the mental daydream where time is well spent.

Her Anger 5 (When I was free)

Happy birthday to me.
She is so displeased.
Thankfully no cake to force feed me.
Just more hate speech, fuels anxiety.

I agree with you I wish I was never born.
Always stitching before this life is torn.
I know you hate me, despise me, and I can see why.
Because you can’t kill my spirit no matter how you try.
Break me into a million pieces and that I survived.
Best pleasure I'm living and you wish I would have died.