Shades of Black

Shades of Black
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She suffered that rare kind of pain.
The more she tried the less she gained.
Always two steps forward and three steps back.  
Finding enlightenment in twelve shades of black.
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(Shade of Black 1)
That shade was almost purple I swear.
“It was black” she said, argue with her I didn't dare.
It was the lightest shade she wore.
That kind that couldn't help but be adored.
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(Shade of Black 2)
It was black alright but seemed somehow calming.
Like the day coming to rest with peaceful yawning.
It was welcoming and it eased my worries and fears.
It wasn’t quite that black that held sadness or tears.
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(Shade of Black 3)
Not much more black than that second one.
But it is more serious and less playful and fun.
It was that shade letting others know she was fine.
Don’t ask her if she's ok, you’d just be wasting time.
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(Shade of Black 4)
A little deeper now and a little bit darker.
This shade is to rebel against her father.
Same shade of black as those bruises.
An innocent child had so many uses.
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(Shade of Black 5)
This was a shade that showed a little more pain.
Often worn on those lonely walks in the rain.
She says she likes it best, no one knows she cried.
She would speak in such a way it was as if her world died.
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(Shade of Black 6)
A little less sad and a bit more anger.
This one warns of imminent danger.
This shade was so silent it spoke out loud.
I tired to ask a question, I was told to “shut my mouth”
 
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(Shade of Black 7 and 8)
There’s no difference between these too shades.
Though 8 over 7 always decides razors blades.
7 thinks about how it would be done.
8 shows you the relief in morbid fun.
 
I find it intriguing how she argues with the shades.
7 or 8 will decide how she behaves.  
I told her why not just throw away your shades of 8?
“I have 12 shades for a reason don’t mess with fate”.
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(Shade of Black 9)
I didn’t like this shade of black and I knew why.
She hated me as a friend and told me to fucking die.
She breaks things in hopes to feel better.
In her calm she quietly writes another suicide letter.
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(Shade of Black 10)
I loved this shade just as much as I loved the first one.
She loved me as her friend, A playful shade that was fun.
When she wore this shade it was because she was sad.
It somehow calmed her, she would never get mad.
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(Shade of Black 11)
The fuck you world of all blacks, the blackest of badass.
She could bend metal, lift cars and chew glass.
Never was I around to witness any of this.
The most frightening thing is her being pist.  
Thankfully this shade is the rarest , please hurry and end.
In these times of shade I really miss my best friend.
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(Shade of black 12)
I had no idea what I was in for this time.
Clearly apathetic she says she was fine.
I've only heard of this shade but never seen it, until now.
Haunting piano music follows her every move, but how?
The winds blew like they were at her command.
Gazing at her, feeling time slow like quicksand.  
Her eyes were sad but full of this beautiful pride.
That was the shade she wore on the day she died.
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She suffered that rare kind of pain.
The more she tried the less she gained.
Always two steps forward and three steps back.  
Finding enlightenment in twelve shades of black.