Shitty Linguistics

if your poems are getting bland
try perking them up
with a few of these shitty colloquialisms

generous-gave a shit

selfish-took a bunch of shit

impaired vision-shitty outlook

unhealthy-looks like shit

hungry-eat shit

broke-no shit

dirty mind-shit for brains

constipated-i shat bigger than you

forgot to wear makeup-shit faced

misguided-lost his shit

searching/seeking-whose shit is this

room odorizer/
Jackson Pollack design
-the shit hit the fan

good hiding place-in a pile of shit

food caught between the teeth
-shit eating grin

thief-taking a shit

dilemma-shit or get off the pot

brownout-shitty day

and, for those who enjoy grammar
enjoy these shitty verb conjugations:

present tense:
 i shit he/she shits you shit we shit they shit

preterite:
i shat he/she shat you shat we shat they shat

present continuous:
i am shitting he/she is shitting you are shitting
we are shitting they are shitting

future:
i will shit he/she will shit you will shit we will shit they will shit

...that’s enough shit to absorb for today

now if you will excuse me
i have to go take
(or is it give?) a shit

don’t wait up for me

(C)2020 Raibeart Bruis