Invisible Panic Room

Trauma impacted her once clear mind
Lost creativity and the ability to shine  
Unprepared for immediate change  
Her environment governed by the injury sustained  
  
Arrogance jaded her internal belief    
Convinced breakdowns were reserved for the weak  
Born into a generation where 'secrecy the key'  
Unaware suppression was not entirely healthy  
   
Protection, appointed to the subconscious mind    
Calibrated, damage to remain confined  
Upon opening a box it seized control  
Disables conscious mind, problem solved  
   
Powerful replacement deployed    
Skilled in avoidance  
Master of denial  
A library of methods to disconnect  
   
Strangers overload adrenal glands.  
Involuntary reactions take command  
Flooded with memories impossible to forget  
Ashamed, suffering excursion regret  
   
Birthed and dubbed the "new normal."    
Certainty required before taking a gamble
Embedded are precise survival traits  
The "New Normal" needs time to assimilate  
   
Uncertainty produces unusual reactions.
Essential are skills of self-distraction  
Reduced to a number in a queue  
Desperate for any breakthrough    
   
Reliving haunting daydreams  
systematically removes self-esteem  
Decision making a cause of distress    
including the simplicity of getting dressed  
   
Experiencing physical and mental pain    
Saps motivation    
feeds self-appointed guilt and shame  
Energy levels completely drain  
   
Superficial comfort found within four walls.    
Lacking courage to face external fireballs
Genius at avoiding social events  
Fear surrounds new environments  
   
Ignorant misconceptions are common  
Declaring anxiety's a 'choice.'    
Uneducated logic dictates attitudes  
Any wonder suffers crave solitude    
   
Mental health is not a choice.  
 produced by losing one's voice  
Suicide used to escape anguish and pain
The ones left behind themself they blame  
   
Accepting help is strength  
Tiny steps forward, even one-tenth  
Backward steps enviable    
But keep fighting the battle!  
   
Looking back is not a crime  
but that version is gone  
Reaching the recovery pinnacle  
Is accepting your "new normal"  
   
3/2/2020  
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Copyright Council 2019”