Are You There?

Dear God,  
itís me;
where the hell have you been?
donít mean to bug you -
I can see how busy you are,
watching little girls lose
their innocence
while evil prevails
~but Iím lost, treading water~
and youíre just never around;
they told me if Iíd only believe
and confess with my mouth,  
youíd come to me
in my time of need;
but you never did,
not once  
were you there,
when the endless parade
of men without morals
standing with ego-laced humility,  
gripping the edge of podiums
with fingers that grasped
at sweet, lacy hems
and ribbons in pigtails
while teaching us all  
how to sacrifice our humanity?
it must have been part  
of your divine plan
as they helped me discover  
the painful irony
of living the sinless life
in broad daylight
while you stilled your ears,
ignoring my muffled cries  
in the darkness  
of midnight
where were you
when the first punch landed
to my unsuspecting face,
disconnecting my jaw
and leaving me unhinged?
were you there
with extra large popcorn in hand,
sliding into your seat
just before the curtains  
came down -
3D glasses firmly in position  
over your omnipotent eyes -
and tell me, please,
did you enjoy the show?
my bleeding, shattered body  
climbing over wet grass,
sticky with my own blood;  
sharp thorns scraping skin  
on diamond-glittered asphalt,
while my burning throat
desperately called out for you
to help me to my safety,
your silence adding insult
to my injuries
it must have been captivating,  
a real five-star performance
because you kept coming back
to be absent for ever more
where are you now,
have you gotten bored?
now that Iím cracked,
bruised and broken;
constantly picking myself  
up from the floor
whenever trauma comes along,
drunk and ready to pick a fight,
kicking over and rearranging  
my mental furniture  
once again,
are you tired of my struggle?
I tell myself you arenít there;
because if you are,
then you know how much
I loathe you,
so smug in your righteousness,
telling me how I must live
and how Iím not allowed to love
while you never once loved me  
at all
Written by LunaGreyhawk
Author's Note
Written for the You and God competition.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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