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deepundergroundpoetry.com

Letter to My Bro

Let me breathe cause I'm steaming
Nowadays it seems like it's every fucking evening
Look me in the eyes and say you're stopping after leaving
Cause honestly my dude I wanna kick your fucking teeth in

Everything I can say, I had that shit repeating
Only thing that's left to do is give your ass a beating
I mean it bro, I love you, but this shit is killing both of us
Got me at your throat, going toe to toe, no holding up

Even though you're broke, and you cost your folks a fortune
you keep on fucking up, guess your mistakes ain't taught you
Thought you might be stronger after all those heart-to-hearts
Giving you support tryna get you on the right path

Leading by example, giving up my habits
Don't you get me wrong, I get this task is hard to manage
But maybe if I showed you how much better shit could be
Within the need to give in to those evil tendencies

You might find the strength to leave it for a weekend, just this once
Fuck this beating round the bush shit, my point should be more blunt
You're a fucking cunt for what you're doing to yourself my dude
These last few fucking months it's like not even you respects you

I have no control over anything that you do,
But do this shit again, I don't know what the fuck I'll do dude
I had you're back from day one
We'd roll it up and blaze some
Joking till the day done
You've always been my main one

I ain't fucking gay son but I'd give my life for you
I'd overdose on coke, just to motherfucking spite you
You've always been a nice dude
Till that look inside your eyes grew
From let's enjoy the night, to
I need another line, just make me feel alive
This shit just ain't right
If you fuck with it again?
You might just lose a friend

I ain't fucking with a crackhead for another fucking day
Look me in the face so I know you feel my pain
It's on your fucking brain every hour of the day
If it kills you, all I'd say is: what a fucking waste

Hardest instrumentals
Bars are fucking mental
Hard to comprehend all the harshness that your pen talks

I know hardships got you mental feeling tension and a mention
of narcotics cause a problem cause you're hooked in this suspension
Fuck a weapon, have my words
They're straight from out the soul
I'm ending my own life
if you never make it grown, yeah it's cold

This my letter to my bro
I just had to let you know, you know?

Written by Benzy_420

(BTheW)

Published 12th Jan 2020

Author's Note

My best mate: hooked on cocaine. Made promises, repeatedly, to sober up. Knew he was fucking himself and his parent's over. No conversations we ever had seemed to have any lasting effect. He's clean now, mostly, and he claims I played no role in him getting to this position. It's hard to not harbour resentment when you spent hours trying to understand and encourage and support, just to be told you had no impact whatsoever. But deep down, I know my role was significant and important. Perhaps it gives him the strength to stay clean if he tells himself it was all him, then he doesn't feel he needs anyone to help him stay clean besides himself. But To invest so much time, energy and emotion into someone you care about a lot, and to have them suggest you made no difference. It hurts.