deepundergroundpoetry.com
MODERN POETRY
MODERN POETRY
Where is the beauty of the word
that makes the person love to read,
and when it's read it moves the heart
whose feelings kindle a deep spell.
Where is the fluency of words
that flow with rhythmic tunes and sounds?
The poem has got just a thought
that can depict an ugly sight.
Where is the clarity of sense
that we should know to feel the charm?
All disappeared and sacrificed
to make the piece a guessing game.
BY JOSEPH ZENIEH
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
____________________________________
Where is the beauty of the word
that makes the person love to read,
and when it's read it moves the heart
whose feelings kindle a deep spell.
Where is the fluency of words
that flow with rhythmic tunes and sounds?
The poem has got just a thought
that can depict an ugly sight.
Where is the clarity of sense
that we should know to feel the charm?
All disappeared and sacrificed
to make the piece a guessing game.
BY JOSEPH ZENIEH
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
____________________________________
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 2
reading list entries 2
comments 19
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 4:56pm
Where is the clarity of sense
that we should know to feel the charm?
Deixis. The charm of what?
that we should know to feel the charm?
Deixis. The charm of what?
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Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 5:01pm
Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 5:16pm
Whether or not that's true, it's undeniable that your line lacks clarity of sense since it is deictic.
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Re. MODERN POETRY
Please tell me how and where this modern poem by Yevtushenko lacks clarity of sense and/or fails "to move the heart".
My beloved will come
And wrap me in her arms.
She will notice the changes
And understand my fears.
Through the black downpour, from night’s gloom,
Forgetting in haste to shut the taxi door,
She will run up the decrepit stairway
Flushed with joy and longing.
She will enter soaking wet
Without knocking.
She will take my head in her hands,
And her blue fur coat will slip
Happily from the chair onto the floor.
I'd also like to know how the pieces you submit here make readers love to read.
My beloved will come
And wrap me in her arms.
She will notice the changes
And understand my fears.
Through the black downpour, from night’s gloom,
Forgetting in haste to shut the taxi door,
She will run up the decrepit stairway
Flushed with joy and longing.
She will enter soaking wet
Without knocking.
She will take my head in her hands,
And her blue fur coat will slip
Happily from the chair onto the floor.
I'd also like to know how the pieces you submit here make readers love to read.
1
Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 5:56pm
This was a powerful post. Like your posts generally are.
You are a roller derby queen knocking over the little kids at the Y.
Have you ever played the jump scare math game with the teacher "Baldy?"
Boo!
I know... I'm not scaring anybody.
❤️
You are a roller derby queen knocking over the little kids at the Y.
Have you ever played the jump scare math game with the teacher "Baldy?"
Boo!
I know... I'm not scaring anybody.
❤️
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Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 5:34pm
Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 5:46pm
Poetry is linke singing. Just do it! Your mind and body will thank you. Who cares what others say if the meaning is clear to you? Jus a thought 💜
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Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 6:10pm
So the purpose of poetry is masturbation -- something designed to give its author pleasure and everyone else be damned?
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Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 6:19pm
Great point!
Is singing like that?
Poetry and singing are a lot alike.
But telling people to only talk and sing to themselves is just a pro-senility message. Are you recruiting?
Cause if you are, you're a hypocrite.😉
Face it, you are only awesome because of all the eyes and ears you tortured to get here. ❤️
Let him live!
Is singing like that?
Poetry and singing are a lot alike.
But telling people to only talk and sing to themselves is just a pro-senility message. Are you recruiting?
Cause if you are, you're a hypocrite.😉
Face it, you are only awesome because of all the eyes and ears you tortured to get here. ❤️
Let him live!
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Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 7:51pm
"But telling people to only talk and sing to themselves is just a pro-senility message."
But you're the one who said JZ should do it.
But you're the one who said JZ should do it.
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Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 8:29pm
It's better than doing it for nobody if he can't continue getting jump-scared by an angry math teacher...
0
Re. MODERN POETRY
Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 8:05pm
Joseph,
Please tell me which of your pieces truly have, in your mind, the potential if not the power, once it's read, to move a reader's heart to feelings that kindle a deep spell, presumably (though you don't say) of pleasure over him/her.
Please tell me which of your pieces truly have, in your mind, the potential if not the power, once it's read, to move a reader's heart to feelings that kindle a deep spell, presumably (though you don't say) of pleasure over him/her.
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Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 8:07pm
Very dear EW,
Thank you very much for your great support. It's very kind of you. Don't be afraid. I can't be negatively affected by Baldwin. No fear. l look at what he writes in case l find some useful criticism, and sometimes l do.I have read a lot about British poets, and l know about English poetry a lot. Don't be afraid. I have known about what l have been doing in the field of poetry for such a long time. Nothing can affect me negatively. But l always look for positive effects even from beginners or from Baldwin himself. Thank you very much, EW, for your great concern.
Thank you very much for your great support. It's very kind of you. Don't be afraid. I can't be negatively affected by Baldwin. No fear. l look at what he writes in case l find some useful criticism, and sometimes l do.I have read a lot about British poets, and l know about English poetry a lot. Don't be afraid. I have known about what l have been doing in the field of poetry for such a long time. Nothing can affect me negatively. But l always look for positive effects even from beginners or from Baldwin himself. Thank you very much, EW, for your great concern.
Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
But notice how Joseph never actually answers direct questions about his submissions or demonstrate through sound argument (ad hominems are not arguments, let alone sound ones) that the things I have noted about his "work" are off base.
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Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 8:33pm
Are you a fan of Taylor Swift?
I think there's room for all of us to calm down.
I'm glad to be aquatinted with both you lil' shrimp.
*bows out*
I think there's room for all of us to calm down.
I'm glad to be aquatinted with both you lil' shrimp.
*bows out*
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Re: Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 8:59pm
What does Taylor Swift have to do with anything. Does she screw up the syntax of the wording of her song's lines to insure that they fit their beat that she's cast her songs in? Does she leave out articles that are necessary for her lines to make sense? Are he lyrics deictic?
I think you would greatly benefit from reading Stephen Fry's _The Ode Less Traveled_.
Suppose you had never played the piano in your life.
Don’t worry, just lift the lid and express yourself. Pour out your feelings.
We have all heard children do just that and we have all wanted to treat them with great violence as a result.
I think you would greatly benefit from reading Stephen Fry's _The Ode Less Traveled_.
Suppose you had never played the piano in your life.
Don’t worry, just lift the lid and express yourself. Pour out your feelings.
We have all heard children do just that and we have all wanted to treat them with great violence as a result.
0
Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 8:52pm
Very dear EW,
I am very glad to know you. You are a great woman, who always tells the truth. This is what l want you to do between us. I want honest criticism. I have a degree in English literature and l am a teacher of English, so l don't lack anything. I read a lot about English poetry, and l love it. Perhaps in the future l can talk with you about poetry, if you wish. I am extremely happy to know you and to have your honest attitude about my poetry. I am confident of myself and my poetry. I think we can be useful to each other. Thank you.
I am very glad to know you. You are a great woman, who always tells the truth. This is what l want you to do between us. I want honest criticism. I have a degree in English literature and l am a teacher of English, so l don't lack anything. I read a lot about English poetry, and l love it. Perhaps in the future l can talk with you about poetry, if you wish. I am extremely happy to know you and to have your honest attitude about my poetry. I am confident of myself and my poetry. I think we can be useful to each other. Thank you.
Re. MODERN POETRY
8th Jan 2020 8:56pm
Dear NB,
Thank you very much for your great support. I am very proud of you honest attitude. You have helped me a lot.
Thank you very much for your great support. I am very proud of you honest attitude. You have helped me a lot.