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Image for the poem .:The Fraudulent:.

.:The Fraudulent:.

Had heard about them interrogations... They say them agents came at you like religion. Heard it was alotta restrictions and they had chronicled all that stuff you used to do. Said they went on & on about how you were living'...all that stuff. Wilbur told me it got kinda rough...A rough ride straight through hell... Tooth & nail… rode you in onna friggin rail. But we heard later, you hung tough in that special jail. We all knew you would... at least as long as you could. We heard through the grapevine Cali did you some good. Right up until you fell off...They say the last time you were seen was onna milk carton. Now that was a funny one; Oh, I’m sorry son. I beg your pardon...That’s really a bad joke...a very bad joke...Yo son; I’m wondering do you still smoke?

You know right before that? Wilbur said you was close to dead broke. Wilbur said that’s when you actually fled to Cali ...out that way stalking’ Halle. Heard you got her to smile twice...But Wilbur said it was without the vice. Said you muted the early warning device...that the both of y'all hit it off quite nice...Two times with one of your flirtatious jokes. Heard you told her one of your peculiar; almost...but not quite dirty birdy jokes. Gave her that soft tongue lashing’ with each of your strokes...Something’ about..

::Monster balls in restroom stalls grow twice their size if Viagra falls::

Can’t say I remember that one. Wilbur said, Halle smiled like she had heard it before...Heard she liked you too...He said you told it to her twice. Yes sir that must've been nice. What I meant is her teeth; girl gotta nice smile. Alotta style. But yeah…heard ya did the white coat bit for a while…they say ya told the same joke or a slight variation to them nurses. All the while snatching’ pills & bills from their purses...Did it justa about every other day...funny how you would’ve had fun that way. We heard they used to treat you to soggy fries & salmon cakes. Used to do this on their payday and while watching you eat...saying all the time it was their treat. They say, most of ‘em just smiled polite...Staring at you all starry eyed …especially at night. They said, one nurse..  Said you bit ‘em in the ass...poked his boyfriend with some broken glass. That’s when they say you started talkin’ to the bugs...The cockroaches n’ slugs. Doing your own “Scarface” kinda thing...the head case of a thug ‘til them bells would ring. They’d be going off inside ya head; yeah…that's what they said. They said you would sometimes chew them slugs... Just a little bit. Trying’ to get that near perfect effect. Then you’d smear them chewed bugs & slugs on the doctor’s file. Floss & pick your teeth for a while.  Doing all of this with the doctor’s favorite pen; they said he’d just grin…Said you’d smile, belch then turn around and do it again

Why would they lie about something’ like that? We know what you’ve done...We know what you could do. So denial, well son that doesn’t even become you...Wilbur said when they released you; you really didn’t wanna leave... Wilbur figured you had other tricks up ya sleeve. Yeah, it was Wilbur saying all that... and as for me…I could picture you being that real M.C. That Master-blaster of all “types” of ceremonies.. Giving lessons to all them fake ass phonies. Getting real cryptic as you’d spin bop & weave. Spinning a flow like none would believe...all that I could conceive. One would’ve thought you were some kinda extraterrestrial. Makin’ those bleeps and blips; you were always The Fraudulent. At least that’s how most your time was spent. Some had said you went into hurricane relief; that’s where your idle time had went...others say you sauntered back into Mexico. You and that vamp Del’Blendo... Yeah we know. We thought we lost you, heard you lost it and it cost you...But I heard later how you went and got yourself an assumed name. Got some plastic surgery and a brand new game...Got Daddy’s Girl to highjack Daddy’s plane. Fly you out...You, her and Wilbur. Heard y’all took one of them old cartel routes...Then while in flight; you pushed Daddy’s Girl out. Gave her your parachute so she’d be DOUBLE safe...Then called her “The Waif” as you waved good bye...Wilbur said she didn't even blink an eye... and yeah; we can only imagine why. And we know for sure...Wilbur don’t lie...at least not as much as you do. You’d think ya would’ve done right by Wilbur...or at least ya self..

::$44 million in untraceable wealth::

Damn, what uh waste.  But enough of that son, can we now just cut to the chase. What in the hell caused you to look me up…your conscious? If ya had one...it was always stuck; running amuck
I mean honestly son… I just don’t give a fuck...but look here; tell me son... why’d you overnight me this damn no-brand cell phone? Asking’ me to take the wiggle-waggle route this far from our home. Got me coming all this way to this outta the way Gas Station.. Yeah son, of course I had a hesitation. What you think; the Feds & INTERPOL went on vacation? What do ya mean turn slowly to my right? Damn son, dude over there looks a little like Wilbur…That dude babbling & mumbling to himself in that dim  blue light!













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photo: Andrew Beierle
Written by kriticool
Published
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