In Dream (as in "real") She's Not here, Never Coming Back

 


(high) cry, crying cries won't
       r e a l        ize
it's own voice, as it continues
               to cry
for one who ain't comin'round
               anymore
like she used to a few years
                 a g o,
when I'd play all kinds of saxophones
            on Mass. St.
Lawrence Ks USA, & i raked in
               so much fckn
dinero as to go to ZenZero for a
                  phat thai
& Thai'hot gai salad with extra
                  fire juice

                     then,
which way did she go? Looking
                     up and
down the damn main street of
                      this fckn
                KU JayHawk town
[where it feels some-how like I
                     wasted (my)
time of my bloody fuckin life,]
                      just
for "a lark", and all the larks flew
                     away
without so much as a word or tweet.

                       so, I'm
lookin lookin lookin for my daughter,
               my Leah Marie
                   My Leah Marie
                       and she
ain't there any'where t'be found.....
                          
                            I
                        begin
to be like suffocating as air won't free
                       my lungs,
and the weeping starts, & starts &
                        keeps on
starting til its just one bloody flow.

                             then,
old idiot wakes up, (is it an awakening?
                            Lord, no.)
and remembers, and recalls the Fact that
                             his little girl,
                             his best pal.
    is forever Dead, nor for'never coming back.
                               Just Dead,
as all beings of this world must do. There ye go.
                                making me
                                     c r y
                        as happens everyday.

She's dead, old man. Someday y'll awaken & know f'sure that
                              she's dead......
                          ( never coming back)
                

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