After All These Years

Knock knock!
…
Knock knock knock!
…
“I’m coming! … Who the fuck is this so early?
…
Hugo! What on earth?”
“I’m sorry Katharine, for …”
“Well … I can’t say … You’d better come in. It was very kind of you to knock … And visit.”
“Katharine …”
“After all this time … As you hopefully know or have probably guessed – I’ve thought about you almost every day … Since you left …”
“And as you probably know or have guessed, I’ve thought of you every day too …”
“Oh Hugo, for fuck’s sake … I’ve … What the hell! Why Hugo, why the fuck!? …”
“Katharine, I’ve never in my life heard you swear so much, I see you’ve kept up with the times.”
“You’re such a wanker Hugo Throssell, if I weren’t a ghost, I’d tear you apart.”
“And if I weren’t a ghost Katharine Susannah Prichard, I’d let you, indeed I’d encourage it profusely.”
“You’re such a wanker Hugo; I hate you with a passion.”
“Oh that’s ok Katharine, I hate myself too.”
“Why the hell are you here Hugo, and now?”
“I thought …”
“Yes? …”
“I thought … We might, oh I don’t know … I suppose I just needed to see you … Speak with you … Say how sorry I am … For everything.”
“You know very well Mister, how I’ve always felt about you … Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Oh, where are my manners? Come in you lovely bastard and sit down … In our house, almost as you … We left it … I’d make you a cup of tea if I could.”
“Gosh, it all does look much the same, as I remember, you look older but gorgeous as ever.”
“Wanker ...”
“You certainly have kept up with the lingo.”
“I wish you wouldn’t keep saying that, why the hell are you here Hugo, and now of all times?”
“I told you, or at least I started to, you see … I’ve been thinking about you all this time and … Felt so bad about everything, and … Wanted to see you every single day, but … Stopped myself, out of guilt, out of love, out of my mind for so long … Damn it!”
“Hugo, I waited for you for nearly half a century to come back to me, in any way – as a ghost, as a spirit, in my fucking dreams you were there, yes, but ... And then, when I died too, I searched every inch I could cover of this god forsaken planet, I looked in the heavens, I even took the drastic step of corresponding with people I loathe in hell … And nothing! Not a fucking hair or sign.”
“Yes well, I’m so glad Katharine that you waited and looked and everything, you see I was … As I said, out of my frigging mind, over you and all the crap they put us through, and everything else … I’ve loved you every single day …”
“Then why? For God’s sake ... Why? You knew how I felt about you, how I’ve always felt, sure we had our disagreements, our moments, but we always fought through, together …”
“I wish we could sit, on our old chairs, and have a cuppa, or a beer or a wine, like we used to.”
“I do too.”
“I wish a lot of things Katharine, I wish many of those things never happened, you know, the obvious things, war, and the cops, and everyone watching us, every move we made, like ants in an ant farm …”
“Yes.”
“I know about our son too, I know about all of that, and none of it’s an excuse, but … The pain, I felt so ashamed, there was no honour, like I thought at one stage there was with war and those fucking useless battles - there I have that modern lingo too, you see I’ve kept a distant eye on things, and frankly liked none of it!”
“Well, I suppose we might agree on that, I miss our boy, he did his best, all things considered …”
“Yes, me too, I miss him as well.”
“Oh, he’s off now, doing great things no doubt, down there or wherever he is?”
“I don’t know if he’s down there or not, you see – I took off – I escaped from there too, hope he did the same. The guards are useless down there, open to bribes, couldn’t really care less, other than the fear, I slipped out quietly and unmissed eons ago.”
“So where have you been all this time, and where could he possibly be?”
“You haven’t guessed? You know I’ve, we’ve, always liked to travel, so I did that, I hope he’s done it too.”
“Travelled where?”
“Well, the first year was the usual expected places – here, I’m sorry again, but I spied on you for a bit, then thought it wrong, after seeing how strong you were, as you’ve always been, then I took off again, travelled the world, lying low so the evil master wouldn’t catch up with me.”
“I did something similar after I died, but of course who would have expected me to go there? But the good lord was surprisingly accommodating, me being an atheist for all of those years, and after you left … I suppose I weakened or something and no, maybe I got stronger, oh I don’t know, but he took me in anyway, and allowed me to roam every now and then, actually whenever I wanted.”
“Oh … I suppose I should have known.”
“Don’t worry Hugo, you weren’t to.”
“No I suppose I wasn’t … But I did see our son once, in a dream, and he was doing just fine, all things considered, he escaped from down there, he’s a smart lad, and he went a-roaming too, just like his dad (and mum I guess).”
“Thank heaven for that! Look at me, talking in clichés as people do, as real people do, I still write you know, it’s allowed up there.”
“I’m very glad to hear it, beautiful thing, it was one of those gifts you had I suppose, and I know how you loved it.”
“I loved it, and you, and our family and our friends, and truth and such, and freedom and peace of sorts, as clichéd as that’s all become too.”
“You sound as cynical as ever Katharine, and as ever – you’re not alone there.”
“Age does that, as they say.”
“It’s great to see you.”
“I suppose it’s nice to see you too.”
“All quite unexpected I know.”
“Indeed.”
“I’ve noticed all these people coming to your house Katharine, to what used to be ours.”
“I still regard it as ours Mister, despite you leaving us; I partially understood that, but may not ever fully forgive you for it.”
“You know I’m sorry, and always will be, I don’t expect anything, including forgiveness, really.”
“Indeed.”
“Yes, all those people, coming and going, I suppose it’s like our friends, back in the day?”
“Yes, that’s how I think of it – all friends and acquaintances, getting to know us, and each other, discussing writing and politics (not so much of the latter let it be said), but caring, mostly good hearted friends just the same.”
“And I’ve noticed how well they keep things, the house and the gardens …”
“Yes they do, and I love them for it, and they are so passionate about art, particularly poetry and writing, not so much the piano, but they do have it tuned, and David still visits every now and then and plays.”
“I saw him and his wife, I’ve forgotten her name, you remember how terrible I am with names, I saw David play at Mundaring Weir ten years ago, he was fabulous as ever, if not better, and the audience, young and old, adored him.”
“Oh how I miss those days and nights, I’ve missed you terribly.”
“I’ve missed you terribly too.”
“Bastard ...”
“Bitch …”
“I’ll always love you, you horrible wonderful man.”
“And I’ll always adore you, you wonderful enchanting thing.”
‘Stay for a while? …”
“Don’t mind if I do …”