less than a week
6 distracted days
dry eyed & hopeful
keeping myself busy
and then it snuck up
somewhere between pouring
and lifting the cup
coffee steaming before forest eyes
I saw your face through the haze
and my vision glazed
I wanted to reach out
just to touch you
but the image splintered with the simple thought
seriously...touch what?
I wanna get it together
just move on
but I don't know where to start
how to let go of what apparently never was
okay...that's not entirely true
my heart was naked & pure
given in all sincerity
to belief
but you weren't as honest as me
I'm watching now as memories twist
becoming something I no longer recognize
and I don't know what to do with it
the change shakes my understanding
sucker punches me
with that immediate knee-jerk feeling
the fabled weakness...self-doubt
"what's wrong with me?"
as soon as the question enters my mind
I rear up
pissed off
and Sassy rallies
girl, don't be a fool
we've been down that track
and we're not going back
I told you
you know this
you're no less
because he didn't see the treasure in you
what isn't meant for us
we rarely fully see
and break it down even further
it's nothing to do with any other
or you not being worthy
this is about honesty
if he couldn't give you that
why would you want him?

(well...I don't
but I miss what I thought we had
the mirage…
my truth
his lies
knowledge doesn't stop the hurt)

so...go ahead then
feel it
let it run its course
then hang that lesson on the wall
another mark on your beautiful heart
ain't his loss
or yours
remember who you are
that's all you can do
just be you
your spirit is fluid as water
and think, girl
what does water do?


Written by FromTheAsh
Author's Note
Copyright © 2019 FromTheAsh. All Rights Reserved
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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