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O Light Invisible (Light Within)
In lapping waves did light recede,
as light within my mind so grieved.
O, light that took no form or mien,
yet rushed along to softly fade;
to shrink as slowly did the day.
A child looked up into the night
and felt as if he was that bright;
within his heart his soul took flight,
high above an innocence
deeply felt, deeply found:
How I was that child once,
unafraid, unbound.
How, removed from
perception, direction,
I was a ray of light in reflection;
a light unfettered, unknowing of domain
gone far afield and free to reign
O'er the small and in the proud,
beaming wide and singing loud:
A light to the ones who hide among crowds
shone into corners to illuminate the Night.
(We scurry about under this glare
as ones who, hopeful only dare).
.....
as light within my mind so grieved.
O, light that took no form or mien,
yet rushed along to softly fade;
to shrink as slowly did the day.
A child looked up into the night
and felt as if he was that bright;
within his heart his soul took flight,
high above an innocence
deeply felt, deeply found:
How I was that child once,
unafraid, unbound.
How, removed from
perception, direction,
I was a ray of light in reflection;
a light unfettered, unknowing of domain
gone far afield and free to reign
O'er the small and in the proud,
beaming wide and singing loud:
A light to the ones who hide among crowds
shone into corners to illuminate the Night.
(We scurry about under this glare
as ones who, hopeful only dare).
.....
Written by
PoetsRevenge
Published 12th Sep 2019
Author's Note
Written for the ' The Love Song Of T.S. Elliot' comp.
Inspired by 'O Light Invisible' by T.S. Elliot
https://www.poeticous.com/t-s-eliot/o-light-invisible?filter=famous
Inspired by 'O Light Invisible' by T.S. Elliot
https://www.poeticous.com/t-s-eliot/o-light-invisible?filter=famous
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 10
reading list entries 3
comments 16
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Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
Anonymous
12th Sep 2019 11:46am
Excellent, PR! Form that floooooooows.
I was a little thrown by the word "mien", but only because I've never encountered it before.
Good luck in the comp!
I was a little thrown by the word "mien", but only because I've never encountered it before.
Good luck in the comp!
1
Re: Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
14th Sep 2019 4:03am
I'm glad it flows, I did a lot of edits on this one, I wanted to recreate TS Elliot's complex writing style a bit..
Thanks for the encouragement :)
Thanks for the encouragement :)
Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
12th Sep 2019 12:12pm
This is a stunning entry, PR. So reflective of T.S. Eliot's inspirational poem. It read beautifully aloud. I can tell you really studied for this one, stepped out of your box and delivered spot on.
Best of luck in the comp!
Best of luck in the comp!
1
Re: Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
14th Sep 2019 4:10am
Thanks so much, I had already read a lot of his well known poems, so I went to poeticious for some I hadn't read yet, and I found this one. It was a tough poem to emulate, so I sort of took a direction of emulating his writing style and themes a bit. I'm so glad it's spot on, being a first attempt :)
Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
13th Sep 2019 1:34am
You are a wordsmith of an entirely different realm.
Bravo.
This is definitely RL worthy.(:
Yours,
LostGirl
Bravo.
This is definitely RL worthy.(:
Yours,
LostGirl
2
Re: Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
14th Sep 2019 4:14am
Thanks so much for that glowing comment, I really appreciate the RL add, I'm so glad you liked it :)
Anonymous
- Edited 27th Dec 2019 12:45pm
14th Sep 2019 10:51am
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
19th Sep 2019 4:34am
Thanks so much for appreciating this, ill have to look up that author sometime..
I'm so glad you liked it :)
I'm so glad you liked it :)
Anonymous
- Edited 21st Oct 2019 5:45am
14th Sep 2019 4:30pm
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
19th Sep 2019 4:42am
I just looked back at my notebook paper, and I did scribble this out exactly as it reads. What I did rework a few times, however was the grammar and spacing, since those things were used for effect in a lot of TS Elliot poems I wanted to attempt that..
Thanks so much for the amazing comment, I'm honored :)
Thanks so much for the amazing comment, I'm honored :)
Anonymous
- Edited 21st Oct 2019 5:45am
19th Sep 2019 2:44pm
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
I like to write on loose sheets of paper on a clipboard, that way I can work on many things at once and go back to them later. I jot down ideas in the margins. After works are finished I put them into a binder. Also I like pilot gel pens :)
Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
14th Sep 2019 6:56pm
This is such a worthy entry, the depth of it's message carried with the syllabic harmony of it's form. <3
1
Re: Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
24th Sep 2019 5:22am
Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
24th Sep 2019 8:15am
Re: Re. O Light Invisible (Light Within)
25th Sep 2019 4:59am