Paralyzing my mind to dig a new thinking path to travel in your search for the perfect toy.  
Shut inside this fear that you so enjoy.  
To you I'm only an object to own and to do with what you will.  
Perching hypocritical upon your seat of bones while pulling my fingernails out of their beds. Enjoying the anguish like a masochistic lover.  
Drowning me to take away my breath, and refusing to give it back until I'm on the precipice...  
Taunting me with your beloved loaded and ready-to- shoot 1911with pearl side grips.  
Damaging my body so I'm throbbing with pain.
Drugging me when you get the chance....
Just so you have the access to fill the bone-dry well inside your soul by violating my consent and dignity.  
You keep thinking that imprisoning me in this cage leaves you in a game of shadows. Underestimating my will to fight...
underestimating me entirely.  
Regarding me as if I couldn't possibly have any fight left in me.  
Disregarding my strength and resilentcy; as if they didn't, and hadn't, ever existed within me.  
Gifting me with increased anxiety and stress that will assassinate me slowly if I let it.  
There hasn't been even the tiny scraps of peace I possessed before inside this mind.  
Surviving you, and surviving now is exhausting...but I won't cease.  
I'm sitting here staring into that cage once again, and I realized that it was your cage all along.  
You just assumed I could take your place willingly or not.  
I'm forgiving your faults, because they are at it's core human, but your actions won't be forgotten as they rot inside your cage.

Copyright ©2019
Laura Behrmann (a.ka jadedembers). All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted  
in any form, or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic, or mechanical methods, without the prior written consent of the author or publisher.  
All my poetry is copyrighted and stored in an author base. All material subject to Copyright infringement laws
Section 512(c)(3) of the U.S. Copyright
Act, 17 U.S.C. S512(c)(3), Laura Behrmann (a.ka jadedembers)
Written by Jadedembers (Starving Demons)
Author's Note
I was thinking back to my abusive unhealthy marriage (thankfully now I'm divorced and still alive). It's a glimpse into domestic violence and how it often goes deeper then physical injury.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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