the shallow end

 
I pulled away you felt it you're right
I have a confession I was secure once in my looks
I don't feel beautiful anymore
sure I have a magnetism  
and for some odd reason, young men are drawn
but these days....at this age it's a mystery to me
 
one day I turned from the mirror then looked back  
and my face had changed
it provided me security my looks
it was something that I counted on
I've paid for being vain
 
it's my personality that draws men now
in person or otherwise
it's a curse in a way
I don't understand it
so it makes me unsure
 
I didn't have to be nice once upon a time
I just had to look good
there is a freedom in that
sure it's shallow
but aren't we all shallow in our own way?
 
I trust what men want in a woman
I want the same thing...beauty
I can't provide it anymore though
 
it hurts skin deep
to have to be beautiful on the inside
after all, I have demons to conceal